The Unforgiving Road
by snsw25kr14
Summary: It started out as a fight, angry words thrown around. However, it wasn't suppossed to end with Sam fighting for his life. Scared!Heartbroken!LIMP!Sam Guilty!Pissed!Worried!Dean Protective!Cas/Bobby. Summary Change. Slight AU-After 4x14. Please R
1. Chapter 1

Author Note: Alright folks, I am officially back and in action! I can't even begin to say how much I've missed writing in this genre. I really have missed writing about my favorite boys. Now I must say that Season 4, blew me away. I defiantly love the idea of more eye candy(Castiel). I also loved the opportunity that Season 4 provided for stories to emerge.

Set in: Season 4. After Episode: 4x14. This will be a slight AU.

* * *

The bar was dark and rather small, not nearly big enough for the large crowd of people. It was packed, not any tables open. Soft classic rock music played in the background of all the talking and other noise, although one table in particular is what caught Stella Denmar's attention.

Two men occupied the table and if the look on each of their faces was a sign of anything, it was that they weren't on good speaking terms. She smirked knowing this was the perfect time to put her plan into action. She sauntered over, making sure to shake her hips as she walked.

"Hello there handsome."

Both men looked up, although the taller of the two quickly looked away. She reached out grabbing the shorter one's arm.

"I don't bite, unless asked to." He smirked and stuck out his hand.

"The name is Dean and yours would be?"

"Stella and I think we should get out of here. Go some place a bit more private."

Dean smirked, picking up his jacket. Sam looked up glaring slightly at his older brother, not believing how he was acting.

"Dean, I can't do this on my own. I need help on this job."

"From what I remember I'm holding you back. So why do you need me now?"

"Dean how many times do I have to tell, I don't hate you. You've never held me back, if anything I hold you back."

Dean scoffed and bent down to Sam's level

"I can't do this anymore. I'm done with this life, I'm done with the lies, Ruby, and most of all I'm done with you."

He watched the flicker of pain in his brothers eyes and couldn't find the heart to care.

"I don't understand."

"Wow, and to think you were smart enough to get into Stanford. I don't want to be anywhere near you, I'm done."

"Please Dean I can't do this on my own. I don't want to." Sam sent a quick look at Stella, who stood behind Dean, and noticed she was listening intently on their conversation and smirking, but only slightly. This majorly confused Sam, she didn't even know them. "Let's just go back to the motel and talk."

Dean scoffed and scooted close enough, that Sam could feel Dean's hot breath in his hear. As Dean spoke he was deadly calm.

"You meant what you said, no matter how hard you try to deny it. No matter whether you were controlled by a siren or not, those thoughts and actions were all you. As far as I'm concerned your not my brother. The brother I remember would never have said those things and actually meant them. My little brother would never drink demon blood, much less sleep with the bitch. He would think before he acted, especially since he promised to not go down that path, whether he though it right or not. You're not my brother, you're a monster."

He moved away from Sam and stood and looked up and saw tears swimming in Sam's hazel eyes and felt nothing.

"Dean don't say that, you can't mean that."

"I meant every word of it." He grabbed the amulet from around his neck and tossed on the cracked table. "Here's proof, if you needed any."

Sam no longer knew how to speak. It seemed as if all the air in his lungs had been sucked out. It was as if his whole chest cavity was being crushed by an unknown source and slowly was being ripped out. His vocal cords seemed to be swollen allowing no air to pass and therefore no words to be spoken. Due to his inability to properly speak he could only watch helplessly as his brother and his soon to be bed partner disappeared into the sea of people. The pain that gripped him was suffocating, but he knew he deserved it. It was utterly and completely his fault, if only he had fought harder against the siren, nothing would be wrong.

Yet deep down he knew things would still be the same. He was a freak, always had been and ultimately always would be. It was his destiny from the day he was born. He was condemned to live life as a freak show, yet he never thought he would be going through everything on his own. He thought Dean would always be the one that supported him, kept him from destroying himself. Apparently he thought wrong. He had lost Dean, again. He barely survived the first time losing his brother, and he knew he wouldn't survive a second time.

He stood shakily, tears threatening to spill over. He was nauseous and barely able to keep the bile from rising. As he put his laptop under his arm and glanced down at the amulet on the table. Before he could stop them, the tears pooled over clouding his vision. He picked it up, holding it as tight as his shaking hand would allow. He would keep it till the day he died, because if that's all he got to keep of Dean, then he would. He wiped his eyes and quickly made his way out of the bar. Once outside he breathed the fresh air, hoping it would clear his head. He breathed deeply not knowing where to go. There was no way he could go back to the motel, chances were slim that Dean was there, but there was still a chance. He sighed walked toward the park that wasn't too far.

When he reached it, the only place he could think to sleep was a bench. It wasn't exactly warm outside and his thin jacket defiantly didn't keep the wind out. He sat down, gently setting his laptop on the ground. As he curled up, he couldn't hold back the choking sobs that wracked his body. He knew it was once again only him alone in the shit whole that was called Earth. It defiantly was going to be a sleepless night.

TBC…please review! I plan to update in a couple of days! Helpful and constructive criticism are more than welcome!

XOXO,

Kaylee


	2. Chapter 2

Author Note: Thank you to everyone who reviewed. It means a lot to know my story is getting recognition. I'm glad the people who reviewed, or didn't review, but still read and enjoyed. If you did read it and added it to your Favorites would you mind leaving a quick review? 

I just wanted to let everyone know that I am trying my best to keep everyone in character. I don't think they're too out of character because of what we the viewers know Dean said about Sam. Okay sorry on to the story.

Chapter 2-The Unforgiving Road.

* * *

Sam awoke cold and stiff. His body protested at any type of movement after sleeping on a hard bench all night. He rubbed and his eyes and winced, they were defiantly sore due to the fact he cried most of the night. His stomach grumbled loudly and he sighed. He stood and made sure to stretch well, trying to get the kinks out of his back and neck. The amount of sleep he got was unknown, but he knew it wasn't much. His mind was too crowded and his emotions running crazy for him too do much more than doze.

All he wanted to do was forget. Forget last night, forget Dean's trip to hell, and forget that he ever accepted Ruby's "help". If he could go back he would in a heartbeat, change everything that made Dean hate him so much, try to be clean. He knew deep down Dean could never forgive him, he had told him terrible things. Things that even though he kept telling himself he didn't mean them, they still seemed to mean a whole heck of a lot to Dean.

**Are you sure you don't mean the things you told Dean?**

_No, I could never say Dean would hold me back. I do need him, more now than ever._

**You don't need him every time you lie to him.**

_I do need him, I lie to protect him. _

**Protect him? Dean's never needed your protection, you've always needed his. **

Sam sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. His thoughts were scrambled, always going back and forth. He knew last night Dean had been drinking, they both were. A part of Sam hoped Dean didn't mean those things, was desperate to tell himself Dean didn't mean those things, and yet who was he kidding? Of course Dean meant those things, look what Sam had put Dean through.

He swallowed thickly, suddenly wishing there was a trickster in the area. He'd do anything to take back being infected with demon blood, no matter whether he was a baby or not. He'd do anything to prevent Dean from going to hell, even if it meant killing Jake in the meantime. He probably wouldn't even go to Stanford, if it would just make Dean his again. Make Dean his older brother, his annoying, pie-loving, classic-rock obsessed older brother.

Getting back to motel was something he knew he'd have to do eventually. To say he was terrified would be an understatement. Going back meant one of two things, either A) Dean would be there and B) Dean wouldn't be there and neither would the Impala. That of course could mean he was still with Stella or he'd up and left Sam for good. He would hold nothing against Dean if he did.

He bent down to get his laptop, making sure the folder of information for their current hunt was not going to fall out. He needed a hot shower. A hot shower always did the trick, along with some breakfast of course. Leaving at the present time was his only option. He wasn't going to risk staying with Dean and having Dean not care, not bother with Sam. Whether or not Sam leaving was going to affect Dean he didn't know and deep down he was scared to know.

He made quick work of getting back to the motel, it helped when the park wasn't but a few blocks away. He scanned the parking lot, anxious for any sign of Dean. The sigh of relief was easily heard, when the Impala was no where to be seen. The jog to their motel room took only a few seconds, but it seemed like forever. As he opened the door he was hoping to see the room the way it was left. What he found shocked him.

The room was spick and span. The previous night their had been beer bottles, chip and candy wrappers everywhere, weapons scattered, also the dirty clothes were in a pile on the floor. As he entered the room he felt a lump form in his throat. On the table Dean's bag was packed neat and tidy, as was Sam's. Confusion coursed through Sam, this either meant Dean was going to leave without Sam or he had planned on Sam going with him. This also meant he had come back to the room last night with Stella? He decided probably not, he wouldn't risk any questions. Unless he decided to do a quick clean up job and a surprisingly good one at that.

Not wanting to hope that that's what the bags were packed for, he quickly grabbed clean clothes and headed to the shower. He dreaded knowing what was in the future for him. A war was headed their way he knew, that they couldn't fight the war each of them by themselves. Although Dean did have the advantage of God on his side, he only had Ruby. Granted she had saved him, but being raised to never trust a demon, was still lodged deep somewhere in his confused head.

He turned the water on hot, almost scorching. It felt good, the heat made him forget his problems if only for a few seconds. The heat also had a way of working all the kinks and aches out of his sore body. He eventually ran all the hot water out. He changed quickly glad to be in warm, clean, and dry clothes. He brushed his hair and teeth, deciding on trying to do anything remotely civil with his hair. He exited the bathroom, wishing he had something to pick up.

He walked over to his laptop and opened it. He grabbed the folder and laid it on Dean's duffle. At least Dean could finish this hunt, it'd be easier for him without Sam's "assistance". Without thinking he grabbed the pen and pad of paper on the old and ratty nightstand. Writing quickly he wouldn't to at least let Dean know he was leaving, just in case he still cared.

_Dean,_

_I'm sorry. I'm sorry that I'm leaving you again, it's sad that I've gotten so good at it. Here's all the information on the hunt, I hope its enough. _

_Your little brother,_

_-Sam-_

He wasn't for sure if he should have added the little brother part, but he was too exhausted to change it. He looked up though, when the door opened and the man he was running away from stood there.

* * *

TBC…I couldn't help leaving it with a cliff hanger, just too tempting. I hope this chapter was enjoyable, and it wasn't a lot longer than the previous one, they will get longer...I promise. Just one last thing, if you are reading this and enjoyed this chapter/story overall please review. All reviews are greatly appreciated…only if there nice. Flames are used to make smores. 

XOXO,

Kaylee


	3. Chapter 3

Author Note: Okay, thank you everyone for all the wonderful reviews. They are all so appreciated. It always makes me so happy to open my e-mail and see reviews.

* * *

He looked at the door trying to hold back a sob. He couldn't believe Dean was here. Of course that was his luck, something always interrupted his plans. He couldn't see Dean's face, but could feel the calculating stare. As Dean stepped into the room, he couldn't find the guts to look him in the face. He turned around and anxiously waited.

"What are you doing here?" It wasn't a question it was an accusatory comment.

"I just needed to get a shower, pack my things."

"Pack your things? Where do you think your going?"

"I'm leaving, it's what you wanted."

He watched anxiously as Dean calmly shut the door. He stepped into the room, seeming to take in the duffle over Sam's shoulder and the file of information lying on the table. He gulped as Dean opened it and picked up the note. The anger that crossed Dean's face could only be directed at him.

"Your right about getting good at leaving. I mean this is what your third time of leaving me alone?"

"Third time leaving you?"

The bitter chuckle that echoed around the small room wasn't unheard by Sam's ears.

"I mean first it was Stanford. Once I got used to the fact that you truly wanted that, I was okay with it. I was so proud of you and your accomplishments. Then there was Cold Oak and I don't blame you for that. That moment is all on me. This time though, the blame is all on you. How you could you be so selfish to leave me here?"

Sam scoffed lightly, wishing he had made it out on time. He had a feeling this conversation was going to turn nasty.

"I'm selfish? At least I didn't leave you for four months."

The tension that rose on Dean's shoulders was frightening. He watched as the folder was hurdled across the room, information spilling in all directions.

"Your blaming me for that, its not like I could just crawl out. Are you really that selfish to sit there and blame me for leaving you for four months when you left dad and I for, four years. You left without any regret; you could have cared less about us."

He turned around, if they were going to do this again, he wasn't going down without fighting.

"Dad's the one who said, 'You walk out that door, don't you ever come back'. So I did just that. It's not like you chased after me, begging me too stay. You said nothing when I walked out that door."

"If I had chased after you would you have listened? Would you have cared?"

"Of course I would have cared. You were always more like a father, a brother, and a friend all wrapped into one. You could have made the difference of me staying. I mean you were the only reason I stayed so long with you and dad in the first place."

The shock that crossed his face wasn't unnoticed. He couldn't believe that Sam may have stayed if he had, had the guts to chase after him. The anger that was still coursing through his veins wouldn't allow him to admit that though.

"That's in the past it doesn't matter. What matters is where we stand now. Obviously you've done fine by yourself while I was gone."

He watched as tears pooled in Sam's eyes and couldn't understand them. Sam had Ruby and Bobby, it's not like he was alone.

"I wasn't fine, I was far from fine. I drank and drank. I didn't care to live anymore. I tried so many different crossroads, to make a deal. I even tried making a deal to end up in hell with you, so I wouldn't be alone. Of course they couldn't accept my soul, all they wanted was yours."

Dean couldn't believe what he was hearing. It explained things, but not everything.

"Ruby she was there. She wasn't you, nor could she ever be you. She was warm and safe. Not really safe I guess, but when I was with her I wasn't alone. She offered support, although not the kind I needed. I mean she tried of offer to drive the Impala, because I was weak after using my powers, but I knew you wouldn't want that. I knew that what I was doing you would never want. I mean you asked for me not to go down that path and I went down it anyways. I had no where else to go. I pushed Bobby away and we had no one else left. I never intended for the blood to become something I craved, and the more I take the more it pumps through my body. I know that. I just wish that what I've done didn't condemn me as a monster, I would give anything for that."

Before Dean could reply, Sam was gone pushing past him and Dean couldn't find it in him to go after him.

* * *

An hour later Dean sat on the bed where he had gone soon after Sam left. The realization of what Sam had been through, made Dean angry. Sam hadn't been the one in hell, being tortured 24/7, everything single day for thirty years. In his mind though, he knew Sam had suffered his own form of torture.

He could remember the words he spat at Sam the previous night. He remembered the look of pure anguish on Sam's face, the disbelief. He knew what he was saying would hurt Sam and that's what he wanted, to cause him pain. The only thing was he couldn't understand why. He knew the affects of the siren was gone, but he felt like something was off.

Could if have been Stella? He quickly shook his head at the thought. He knew there was no way it was her. She was completely human; he knew that from last night. He looked at the pile of information scattered around the room. He remembered the note, so angry that Sam could actually have the gall to leave him that he didn't realize what it actually said.

He stood walking over to where the remains lay. He was lucky he hadn't completely ripped it to shreds. He quickly put it together and read. Since the first time Sam had left he felt guilty, especially when he saw Sam had still referred to himself as Dean's "little brother".

He always knew Sam had a heart of gold, was able to forgive almost anything, even if he didn't understand it. While he didn't know what was going on with him, he hoped that Sam could forgive him. He hoped his little brother still had a heart of gold, after everything he'd been through. All he could hope was Sam was safe. With that last thought he collapsed on the bed, completely exhausted.

* * *

TBC…I hope it didn't disappoint. I actually took this chapter in a little different direction than I had originally planned. I hope the angst and brotherly interaction, although it wasn't a nice moment was good. Well drop me a review. 

XOXO,

Kaylee


	4. Chapter 4

Author Note: Thank you so much to everyone who has left a review. It means so much! I truly appreciate it. This chapter goes in a different direction than I thought it would and we get a much deeper look into what exactly is going on. It defiantly gets more exciting, so enjoy!

* * *

It had been a week since Sam had seen his brother. Everyday he woke up wishing and praying that Dean would call, that he would show he still cared. Everyday though there was nothing, no phone call, not even from Bobby.

He had moved around, not wanting to be tracked. He didn't want to be found, but it would be nice to know someone was at least looking. He had decided he would do whatever it took to make himself clean. As far as he was concerned he was already dead, especially with loads of demon blood running through his body.

Something that had been bothering him though was that Ruby hadn't shown up lately. He hadn't seen her in two weeks. Not that he wanted to see her and deal with all of her questions. He was just surprised that she wasn't around to encourage him that what he was doing was ok, that he could defeat Lilith so long as he continued using his powers.

His thoughts of Ruby caused sudden anger to course through his body. It was her fault he became more of a monster and a whole new level of freak. She had sworn to him by opening himself up to his powers that he would be able to save Dean. He had taken the dark road, the road Dean asked him not to, because he was sure that he would be able to save Dean. Instead it led him down a more dangerous path than he had already been on.

_If I didn't know you I would want to hunt you, and so would other hunters._

He shivered at the words that Dean had spat at him. The punches that followed would always remind him that from that moment on Dean viewed him as a monster. At that time he didn't have to say it, they both knew what he was thinking. The look of betrayal in Dean's eyes would never leave him, it was worse than the time he had alerted his family that he would be leaving for Stanford.

What bugged him the most was that he knew Dean was right. Hunters would be on his tail as soon as word spread. He was surprised he hadn't been hunted yet. He didn't know why, but he had a feeling it was because they had all heard of Dean's death. They all knew to keep their distance, knew Sam was deadly, when he had nothing to lose.

Yet, now he had everything to lose. Dean was back and because of the choices he'd made, he could ultimately lose him all over again. To say he had survived losing Dean the first time would be a lie. When Dean died he died, sure he still breathed, hunted, and ate, but only because he had too. He did the bare minimum to keep himself alive, hoping every time he went on a hunt he'd be killed. Dying would have been so much better than living with the pain and guilt that destroyed little by little each and every day.

The hunt he was currently on wasn't much. A simple haunting, nothing he hadn't done a thousand times. He felt nervous since he knew Dean was back and not with him. He knew he could take the initiative and call either Dean or Bobby and yet he didn't want too. He was scared that they wouldn't answer or they would and even more hurtful and angry words would be thrown his way.

He tiredly rubbed his eyes. He stiffened as a knock sounded on the door. He grabbed his gun and carefully made his way too the door. He relaxed when he noted it was only Ruby.

**(I hate putting an A/N in the middle of the story, but for this part of my story to work Ruby is going to have to be played by Katie Cassidy, so were just going to have to say she injured and unconscious in Season 3, but, wasn't dead…there are reasons why this has to happen, at least for this story. I couldn't have GC playing Ruby because well…you'll all see why.)**

As he opened the door he was shocked to see Ruby soaked, her blonde hair matted and tangled. She stepped through the door seeming very unsure of herself.

"Ruby are you okay?"

"My name isn't Ruby."

Sam was confused; of course her name was Ruby.

"What the in the hell are you talking about?"

"I-I'm not possessed anymore. I don't know for sure what happened, but all I remember is waking up and I suddenly felt human again, like I was before she entered by body."

Sam was in shock. So Ruby had exited her host, who was now in his hotel room and he had no idea why she was here.

"Why are you here? How did you find me?"

"All I know is I need to warn you. Ruby, even though she had control nearly all the time, at times I had control occasionally. During those times I desperately listened to what you and your brother said. It didn't help me any, but it helped me understand what was happening. When Ruby left me because of Lilith, I left the circle I was in. It didn't do me any good, because then Lilith possessed me. After I was stabbed, I don't know, I somehow made it to a hospital. Everything from that time is very blurry. All I know is I was getting my life back, and then she was back."

Sam sat in shock at what he just been told. While most of it didn't make sense, he didn't feel he had the right to question what she was saying. He knew the young woman in front of him was no longer possessed, but that in itself only left many more questions.

"I believe you, while a lot of it is confusing and doesn't make sense, I believe you. In truth I don't want to know what happened, just how did you find me?"

The chuckle that exited the young woman was sweet and melodic, nothing like the rough scoffs that "Ruby" had used.

"You don't know how much your trust means to me. I knew where to find you because I still had my cell phone and it wasn't hard to track you using your number."

He didn't know what to think. So Ruby had disappeared, no where to be found or seen. That would explain why he hadn't seen her in so long, but why?

"Thank you so much. I'll defiantly take what you said and use it to whatever advantage I can find."

"You are more than welcome. Sam, may I ask something of you?"

"Of course."

"You don't need that demon blood. It wasn't pleasant getting it sucked out of me. Please promise me that you'll never let that happen again. I only know the surface of you and what I see is a man who is so strong, but like everyone you have your vice. You've just got to find something that is more important than getting your "fix". When you find that reason, hang on to it and do whatever you have to, to keep yourself from going down that road."

She took an envelope out of her purse, smiling gently, and put it in his hands.

"This is all the information you need. I know I should probably tell you myself, but I'm trying to get past what I've been through. I promise all honesty in that letter. I just want to see you become something great."

"Why?"

"Because, Sam, I never will."

With another smile she gently kissed his cheek and crept from the room. He held the envelope, suddenly terrified at what it held. He opened it knowing it would give him some answers.

_Sam,_

_I hope that this letter will mean something to you, give you the answers I can only imagine your looking for. For nearly two years, I have had no life. This is only because I had things that have happened to me that I never asked for. I hope that by giving you this information we can both find a way to discover the strength that we didn't know we had._

_As you read this it means I have already been to visit you. I can only assume as I write this that it means you believed me. I want you to understand if I had, had any sort of true control I would have done anything possible to help you. Whether it be with your grieving process or finding a way to help Dean. I feel that I owe you that much, while I didn't put you through what you've been through. My body did, and for that I feel I owe you something. Below is as much information that I can remember._

_On October 2nd 2008, all I know is Ruby met with other demons. Parts of the conversation I didn't understand. I know she doesn't want Dean anywhere near you. A plan was put in place to split both of you up. I clearly remember her stating she would "leave this dumb blonde host to find one more suitable, one that would attract Dean away from Sam, so plans could start in order to make Sam more powerful. The plan would begin when both brothers were at their weakest, when Dean knew of Sam's abilities, when all trust would be thrown out the window."_

_What I do know is that Ruby isn't who you think she is. She is using you and I know that doesn't seem to make sense. Think about it, she wants you to use your powers, offers you a chance to save Dean. She uses that above your head, she knows Dean is your weakness that you'll do whatever it takes to save your brother. As you now know Dean was never able to be saved, and he knew that. I can only guess he didn't tell you that because he wanted you to have that hope. It isn't his fault, it's hers. You have only her to blame and I would suggest killing the bitch. You are so much stronger than you think, and I'm not talking about with your demon powers, you just have to find a little extra strength to believe it yourself._

_I can only hope the little bit of information I was able to provide will get the ball rolling for you, will allow you to understand more. I only hope I have given this too you in time, you must be careful._

_Sincerely,_

_Kailen_

He sat in shocked after reading the letter. He knew there were no lies written in it. How could he have been so stupid? It all clicked into place. Ruby missing and the way a week ago the woman Dean picked up had smirked, like everything was going the way she wanted. What was her name? Staci? Sasha? No it was Stella and as soon as she had come over everything had gone to hell.

He quickly packed not even realizing he was doing it. He shoved the letter in his duffle and picked up his laptop, he needed to get to Dean whether he wanted to listen or not. As he exited the motel room, the hairs on his neck stood on end. He knew something was wrong. Before he had time to realize what had happened he felt himself falling. He knew without a doubt he was in big trouble especially when he looked down and saw the red seeping through.

* * *

Author Note: TBC. Whew…I can't believe this chapter is actually done. Man, it took a while. I hope non of it was confusing, if it was all you have to do let me know, preferably in a review. Update will be done tomorrow. Also, I didn't realize how long this chapter was, well I did promise the chapters would get longer! lol. : )

XOXO,

Kaylee

P.S. PLEASE leave a REVIEW. It always sucks to have so many people view your story and put you under favorites or alerts and then not have them review. It's not that difficult...just something simple. So please, with a cherry on top, hit the green button below, I'll give you lots of cookies and chocolate.


	5. Chapter 5

Author Note: I want to say thank you for everyone who reviewed. It means so much to me. So for everyone who reviewed, I give you all cookies. If anyone else wants a cookie, you know what you have to do. I do promise for the next chapter to be longer!

* * *

He had gone to the bar, all purposes and reason to see what information he could find. He needed to escape the hotel room, its ugly ass wallpaper screaming at him, that he was alone. The one thing he hated was being alone; it left him empty and withdrawn. He needed something to take his mind off everything.

As he ordered his beer and took a seat at one of the cracked and worn tables he just decided to watch. He never usually got a chance to see what the people around him were doing; he either had to listen to Sam's whining or Sam's ideas. In the end though, Sam, was always his distraction. As he looked around he noticed her-Stella-, the girl that had left him breathless only one week ago.

He smiled as she noticed him and walked over, so much for looking at all the people.

"Hey sugar, what are you doing here? I thought you were leaving this damn town?"

"Naw, I couldn't leave without seeing you again."

It didn't take being told twice for her to get the hint.

"You sure your brother won't mind?"

"No, he's a out of town."

He watched as she smirked, only slightly. Before he realized it, it was gone. That left him a little confused, but he could only guess she was happy that she didn't have to worry about a distraction or a problem of a fight arising, like the last time.

"How about we take my car? If this is the last time I see you, I want you to really know me?"

He wasn't in the mood to question anything. So long as she was able to make him forget the stress he was in, he'd do whatever she said.

"Sure, lead the way."

The house they arrived at was a huge two-story farm house, defiantly not what he was expecting. He expected a little house in the middle of town, a few flowers in the yard. He had never seen where she lived, nor could have guessed. Last time it was a completley different location. She smiled as she pulled in.

"This was my grandmother's. It became mine after she passed."

He nodded, feeling bad for Stella. It wasn't easy to lose a loved one. As always though he made sure to quickly view his surroundings, off to the side of the house there was a huge barn. It was white, and looked to be very old, he wondered what it held. As she turned the car off and stepped out, he could only watch her as she quickly entered the house. She was a confusing girl, never giving much say in what she was going to do.

This place gave him the creeps. It just didn't sit right with him that someone like Stella, would live in a place like this. Not that he was passing judgment, he could understand especially if the place held special value to her and her family. Maybe it was the fact that it wasn't bright. There were no signs of anything girly, not even any flowers. Oh well, he'd seen much, much weirder.

As he walked inside the house, he was shocked at how clean it was. It wasn't like he was expecting a haystack of a mess, but he was still surprised at the tidiness at the inside of the house. He had no clue where Stella disappeared too, but he decided to make himself comfortable. It didn't take him long to find the living room. He saw numerous pictures, some of an older lady, who he could only assume was Stella's grandmother.

He jumped as the phone rang. He didn't feel he had a right to answer it, but he didn't know if it was someone important. Plus his alertness as a hunter, told him he should check it out. Since the phone was on the coffee table, not to far away, he looked at the caller idea. It read: _Unknown Number. _He heard it suddenly quit ringing and could only figure that Stella got it. Even though he felt relatively comfortable in the house, something deep down was telling him to answer it. When did he ever go against his instinct? As he answered the phone he made sure to hold to be absolutley quite. He was suddenly thankful for the years he had been forced to practice in being absolutley silent, where making a noise, even breathing to loudly could get you killed.

"Did you get the boy?"

"Yes, as promised."

"Good, Good. What about the older brother?"

"He's here. He doesn't suspect a thing. I know what he likes, how to keep him occupied. The plan went off without a hitch."

"That's very good and you should be awarded with whatever desires you most. The boy still trusts you completely, yes?"

"Oh yes, I am giving him what he craves most. He can only go for so long before he begs for a fix."

"You are absolutely positive the older brother suspects nothing."

"Yes, and if he does he will be dealt with."

"You must not kill him, which is an order. Kill neither of the brothers. I will do with them as I see fit, is that understood."

"Yes."

"Good, I will check in later."

He suddenly felt sick. It had been a trick all along. Stella, oh god. She wasn't human, well she was, but the only thing he could see her being human was for her to be possessed. The only person he could guess that would possess her would be…Ruby. He felt undesirable rage, she had tricked Sam, used him all along. He knew he wasn't caught from listening to the conversation; it was too controlled and professional. Plus Ruby was sloppy, she would most likely have let it slip that he knew something, anything.

He suddenly knew it was of dire action that he find Sam. For all he knew, Sam could be seriously injured, especially since he hadn't seen or spoken to him in a week. He didn't know what to do, he defiantly didn't want to alert Ruby or Stella, whoever the hell she was that he knew what was going on. On the other hand there was no way in hell he was going to sleep with a demon. He truly didn't know what to do, he needed help.

* * *

Alrighty, so not exactly the longest chapter, but still at least much more is known now. What will happen to Sam? Dean? I'm actually not sure if there will be an update tomorrow, I have a family gathering that will last all day, but I'll see what I can do. If nothing else there may be a chapter really late tonight, maybe tomorrow morning. It all depends on what time I leave. There will defiantly be an update on Sunday, that I promise. Well…TBC.

XOXO,

Kaylee

P.S. Make sure to leave a REVIEW. Even if it's short and sweet. All who leave a review will get there choice of any sweet they want. Who doesn't love ice-cream? Chocolate? Cookies? I would love to reach 40 reviews, as a total so far for this story. I know it wouldn't be difficult, you just have to review. 

A/N: Okay so I did have this figured out, but it's going in a different direction than I orgianally had planned. -sigh-. If there is anyone willing to give me an idea on what to do with the boys, especially Dean, then that will be more than welcome. I know I can figure something out, but it helps when you have people who are actually the one's reading the story, give you ideas. Well all help and ideas will be greatly appreciated...just PM me. 


	6. Chapter 6

Author Note: I owe my greatest thanks to those who left me reviews. So many sweets on the way. This chapter is longer, than the previous one because this was my Sunday post if I couldn't update today. Fortunately I stayed up until midnight writing this and had to wake up at 8:00, which it is now almost 11 and I must walk out the door. Ugh. Anyways Enjoy.

Disclaimer: I own nothing related to Supernatural…it all belongs to Erik Kripke. (I just realized reading back through the story, that I completely forgot to add this. Woops)

* * *

The first thing he realized when he woke up was that he was tied to something. The second was that it was dark, extremely dark. The third was that he had no clue where in the world he was. The last thing was that there was unimaginable pain radiating through his shoulder.

The pain made him want to pass out. It was almost unbearable and he had only suffered pain like this once in a blue moon. He knew he had been shot. How long ago he didn't know and why he didn't know. All he knew was he was in deep, deep trouble. He grimaced as he tried to loosen whatever was binding him. After a futile struggle, he gave up knowing all the energy he possessed would have to be used to help in whatever situation he had currently gotten himself in.

He thought back to the last thing he remembered. He remembered Ruby or whom he thought was Ruby show up at his door. As it turned out it was the host that Ruby had been possessing, alive and well. He had been shocked upon hearing what she had been through. Through all the years of hunting, especially people possessed they never got a chance to fully understand what the host had been through. Mostly because the host had either died or been in to much shock to understand what had happened to them.

The letter that Kailen had given him provided him with so much insight. Insight into what was really going on. It gave him knowledge that would be most helpful in the coming war. What it gave him the most was strength, somehow Kailen and the letter proved that deep, deep down he still had humanity left. It was just buried down so deep behind pain, anger, betrayal, confusion, and anxiety that it was lost within him. It also didn't help that he had a brother that hated him and the ever constant threat of both angels and demons wanting him dead.

He figured something had happened. Either something he had done or maybe he had been followed. Whatever it was, however he got into this situation, he knew he needed help. For some reason, it felt as though no help was going to come for him. Even if they did, he had no cell phone that he could feel. He also had no idea where in the world he was. All he knew was he was in pain and alone. He was alone…again.

He was dizzy and hungry. Plus he had no way of knowing whether or not the wound was patched or still bleeding. He could only hope who or what had taken him, had taken the time to patch him up. His stomach cramped and his head was killing him. He could definitely go for a glass of water and a few pain killers.

He could only figure that a hunter was what wanted him dead. Well, he hoped he wasn't wanted dead, but it was the most logical thought. Hunters had heard of Dean's death and tried to contact Sam, give their sympathies. The fact of the matter was, not many hunters knew what sympathy was. There was no time for it in the line of work. So it wasn't too surprising when so many hunters wanted to express some form of sorrow. If nothing else they had heard how good a hunter Dean was. Although if it they didn't know how good a hunter Dean was, it was knowing Dean was John Winchesters son.

He winced as he heard the squeak of hinges, on what could only be an old and un-oiled door. As he looked up he could see the reflection of the moon on the ground, well at least he knew it was night outside. He watched as a figure walked toward him.

"Sam, it's so good to see you awake."

He was very confused. Why in the world was Stella of all people, the one to kidnap him.

"Oh Sam, don't think too hard, wouldn't want you to have an aneurism. Besides I can't believe you don't recognize me. I'm hurt."

He listened as Stella spoke, the way she directed him. Something about the way she in particular talked to him was familiar.

"Ruby, is that you?"

"Oh, so you do recognize me. Good, I was a little worried."

"So you're here to help me. Oh, thank god."

He watched as her eyes flashed black, pure malicious intent shown through them.

"Oh no Sam, I'm not here to help you. Let's just say I'm following orders."

The rate of his heart, he was almost positive could be heard for miles. It was so loud; it was ringing in his ears. He knew from the letter that Ruby was working against him, but he didn't think demons would act upon him this fast.

"So all along it was a trick. You never meant to help me."

"Sam please, of course I meant to help you. I did, you just didn't realize in the process I would get so much more out of it than you."

"What do you want with me?

The question seemed to catch her off guard. She sat on his lap, causing him to grown in pain as his shoulder was roughly stirred around.

"Sammy, all I've ever wanted is you. I mean your pure muscle, pure determination. God, that's sexy."

She smiled, smirking.

"Get the fuck off of me, you stupid selfish pig."

She glared, her eyes flashing black once again. The sting that radiated through his cheek, didn't touch the pain in his shoulder.

"You'll regret ever saying that. When Lilith is done with you, you'll beg for death, beg to be on hell's side."

Before he could answer he was consumed in darkness.

* * *

To say Dean was inpatient would be an understatement. The fact that Sam was somewhere on this god forsaken hillbilly land didn't sit well with him. He knew that Sam was most definitely injured, how severe though, was unknown to him. He still remained where he had originally seated himself fifteen minutes earlier. He could only briefly nod his head as Ruby left to go out to the car. He had a feeling she definitely wasn't in the car, looking for something.

He felt in the waistband of his pant, always glad for his extra precaution. The gun remained secure and steady, instantly calming him down. He knew he would do whatever it took to get his brother back, he just had to bide his time. Before he knew it she was back standing in front of him, expectantly motioning towards the stairs.

"How about we get this party started?"

He rose, feeling much more confident on his feet.

"You know I just have one question?"

"Ask me anything."

"I know demons are good, good at manipulation, but how exactly are you going to get out of the devils trap I have you in?"

He could only watch as she glared, her eyes turning a coal black. It didn't bother him, in fact it was something he was quite accustomed to. She sneered before sitting down. He could only bring the gun out if front of him, handling it gently.

"How about you and I have a discussion?"

* * *

TBC…so I know I said I didn't think I'd get this updated, but I just love this story too much. Ooo…it just keeps getting more and more interesting! Well since it is midnight, and I had to get up extra early this morning…how about giving me the best gift and leaving a review? –gives puppy dog eyes-

XoXo,

Kaylee


	7. Chapter 7

Author Note: Okay so a huge thanks to everyone who reviewed. It is awesome to know I asked for 40 reviews, and got over 40. I love all of you.

Side note: I am sorry for not updating yesterday (Sunday). Ugh, with Father's Day, I wasn't home at all. Then when I got home, it was dark out, my brother and I went swimming (We have a swimming pool). We were playing catch and we both went after the ball and he poked me in the eye. I thought I lost my eye. Thankfully I didn't. Ha-ha. Then my back started throbbing, so I headed to bed. So there is the reason for no update. I hope this chapter makes up for it.

* * *

It had been hours and still nothing. It was a good thing that Dean Winchester was an extremely patient man. It hadn't all bothered him that much that the demon in front of him hadn't talked; he figured he could allow Ruby to think she was going to win whatever sick game she was playing. Sadly, though she must have been dumber than he had originally thought.

The thing that had been bothering him the most was that he knew his brother was somewhere on the property. Of course, somewhere was the key word. His best guess was that Sam was not in the house. Demons may be dumb, but even Ruby wasn't that dumb. His other guess would be Sam was in the barn. It made the most logical sense; keep Sam somewhere, where even if he yelled he couldn't be heard. Once he was through with Ruby, he'd go on the search for his little brother.

He stared at Ruby, wishing he could kill her and get it over with. She had refused to look at him, which surprised him. He figured she would spout her mouth off, rile him up so he'd snap sooner. The only thing she wasn't counting on was in he didn't mind waiting. Eventually either she would break or he would break her, either way she wasn't walking out of this room.

"You know, why did you use Sam like that?"

"Why do you care?"

"Because you stupid bitch, Sam is my little brother. I won't have someone like you hurting him anymore than you already have."

She smirked, eyes flashing black.

"You think I hurt him, wait till Lilith gets done with him. Better yet wait till Lucifer is done, you won't have a little brother anymore."

He felt his chest freeze at the thought of anyone getting their hands on Sam. He wouldn't allow it, couldn't allow it.

"Sorry, but that's not going to happen. All of you demons will be stopped, you won't hurt anyone anymore."

She chuckled, it sounded rough and grainy.

"You really believe that? That this war will end, it will never end. Why do you think that we can be stopped, because you have angels and God on your side? Please, they could care less what happened to the human race."

"I'm gonna kill you, slowly and painfully. That I can guarantee. First, you're going to start by telling me where Sam is."

"Dean, I know you don't like me, so why would I give you anything you ask for?"

"Who said I was asking?"

Before she could reply, he had grabbed the bucket of holy water on the floor next to him. He threw it on her, watching as she screamed in agony. He only felt a slight satisfaction, because she deserved so much more. She breathed heavily, her black eyes pinning him with promises of pain and revenge of her own. It didn't faze him; she was nothing to him, except a monster that needed to be destroyed.

"Okay, Okay, what do you want to know?"

He picked up another bucket of holy water, watching as her eyes widened.

"If I even think you're lying, you will get this, plus so much more and don't think I'll hesitate."

She nodded eyes still wide.

"We want him for many purposes. He's so powerful; he could be so much more powerful and strong than he already is. We need him to release Lucifer, and then the war can truly begin. I knew that when I told him by using his powers that he might be able to save you, he would hold onto that, do whatever he had to get you out. His love for you is so overpowering, he'd die for you and yet I was never enough. I gave him everything I had, and he always comes running back to-

The words were cut off as holy water was once again poured over her. He hated hearing the conversation turn to her, he wasn't her to discuss her, and he was here to get information, find Sam.

"You basterd, I'm giving you the information you asked for."

"No, you're making this about you. I warned you to give me the information I needed, and if I have you spouting off a bunch of bullshit about how Sam always comes running back to me, you'll be in hell quicker than your eyes can flash black is that understood?"

"Yes, now what else do you want?"

"What I want is why did you convince Sam to drink demon blood, much less your blood? What do the demons want with him? How did you gain his trust?"

"Well first I didn't convince Sam to drink demon, I mean my blood, I just simply offered I simply, told him that by drinking this blood, it would release you from the deep, dark, fiery pits of hell. He took it before he could think twice. I watched as he became more powerful, growing day by day. I did what you never could. I helped him harness his powers and embrace them. We want Sam to open the gates of hell, let Lucifer out. He'll end this war; well he'll start the beginning of the end. As for how he gained my trust, that was the easiest part. I was the only one around to take care of him, offer him warmth and protection. The sad thing is, is he knows he's changing becoming what he has always feared. Yet, you're too caught up in your own dreaded life, you don't even notice. I may not like you, in fact I hate you, but for Sam's sake he deserves so much more than you."

Dean glared; taking in all the information he'd been told. He wanted so bad to exercise her so badly, but he knew he still needed her, could use her to his advantage.

"You know, why you digest the information I've told you, I would suggest looking for Sam. If I'm correct, right about now, he's probably chocking on his own blood, struggling to stay alive. I mean why you were busy with me, it would have been so easy for Lilith to get to him, but then again that's just a guess."

He looked at her face for any trace of a lie or manipulation. He saw none and with that he was out of the house faster than he thought possible, his only thoughts on getting to Sam.

* * *

Author Note: TBC… Okay there it is. I hope it is okay, I really enjoyed writing it. While Ruby wasn't tortured as much as I wanted, there are still quite a few twists and turns I have planned. Will Dean get to Sammy on time? What is Sam's condition? So many unanswered questions. An update will be posted tomorrow, I'll try to make it a little longer also. Lol. 

P.S. PLEASE LEAVE A REVIEW. Even if your just adding this story to an Alert or Favorite, please review. They are all appreciated. I am hoping for oh 55 reviews. That is only 12 reviews. Please, lots of cookies, ice-cream, and brownies available. Also maybe a huge swimming pool, just because it's so damn hot outside. 

XOXO,

Kaylee


	8. Chapter 8

Author Note: Thank you to everyone for the encouraging reviews. I truly appreciate them and while I didn't get 55 reviews, I so far have 49. I only got 6 reviews for chapter 7! –Sigh-. Darn, well I am hoping for more this time around. Please READ note at bottom, after reading this chapter! The note at the bottom of the chapter is just to let people know how I feel, it's not meant for me to sound whiny or anything like that. In fact I think a lot of people, who are authors, themselves will be able to understand where I am coming from! 

Disclaimer: I own nothing related to Supernatural, oh how I wish I did. (I keep forgetting to add this)

P.S. I know I started promising longer chapters and I think I am finally getting around to fullfilling that promise. This chapter is 2, 189 words long. Woot...go me . XD

* * *

He didn't realize just how fast he was running. He wasn't for sure where Sam was, but he could only hope he was in the barn. Instincts were telling him to look there, and he would always listen to his instincts first. As he pulled open the barn door, he was surprised at how dark it was. He pulled out a flashlight that he always kept in his coat.

What he saw made his stomach shake. Sam was in the barn all right, but whether or not he was alive was a different story. There was blood seeping from his nose and mouth. It appeared he had a gash on his forehead. There was also a large wound on his chest, along with another wound on his shoulder. It also didn't help that he appeared weak and unresponsive. Plus, even though it wasn't extremely cold, it was still chilly and Sam was shirtless.

He knelt before him, placing two fingers on his brother's neck. He sighed in relief when he felt a pulse, slow and a little erratic, but still there. He didn't know how long Sam had been tied up, but he could only imagine how sore he was. He quickly untied Sam's arms and Sam fell forward, still not moving. He pulled Sam down and gently laid him on the ground.

He knew it was important to check Sam's injuries, see just how bad he was. He started with the chest and shoulder. He could tell right away Sam had been shot in the shoulder, although it appeared as if some type of pressure had been applied, but then taken off. His chest looked terribly painful. It had red welts, some bleeding, almost as if Sam had been struck with a belt. His face was bloody and bruised. The gash in his forehead was still seeping blood and he knew it would require stitches. He couldn't figure out where the blood still seeping from his nose and mouth was coming from.

_If I'm correct, right about now, he's probably chocking on his own blood, struggling to stay alive. I mean why you were busy with me, it would have been so easy for Lilith to get to him._

As he cradled Sam, he couldn't help feeling fearful. What if the reason for Sam's condition was because of Lilith? Would it have been possible for her to get to him? Even as he asked himself the questions he knew it would have been extremely easy for any number of demons to get to Sam. What worried him is exactly, if it was all Lilith that had done this, what exactly had been done to Sam. He knew from experience, that even if an injury on the outside doesn't look too bad, it could be causing serious damage on the inside. He scooped Sam up, surprised at how easy it was. The damn kid had lost too much weight; he would get a good meal in him, after he got him to the hospital. The blood still seeping from Sam's nose and mouth may have been Lilith, but why leave him alive?

_We want Sam to open the gates of hell, let Lucifer out. He'll end this war; well he'll start the beginning of the end._

As he continued his way to the Impala, his thoughts couldn't quite fully understand what Ruby meant. If Sam was supposed to open the gates of hell and release Lucifer, why go through all the trouble of the current situation. He knew Sammy's powers were progressing, it didn't take a genius to notice it, it just didn't make sense that they were progressing. As he reached the Impala and maneuvered his giant of a little brother into the backseat, he could only hope things wouldn't get worse. He didn't have medical supplies with him, so there was no way to patch him up. He needed a hospital; they could do more for him than what was available. It was risky to go to a hospital, but there was no other option.

Before he left, one thing still needed to be taken care of. The name of the certain thing was Ruby. The journal was held protectively in his arms, along with a small bottle of holy water. He knew the fear of being sent back to hell would make Ruby spill more than she ever intended. As he entered the house he noticed it was quite, too quite. He entered the room where Ruby had been held and suddenly felt like he was going to throw up. Ruby was gone.

* * *

He had made it to the hospital, anxious to get Sammy some much needed help. He wasn't good at waiting, especially when it concerned his family. The shock of Ruby missing only lasted a short while, because when he got back to the car, Sam had spiked a fever. Now though as he had time to mule over his encounter with Ruby, it didn't make sense how she escaped.

Devils traps were made for a specific reason, to hold demons. So there was no way Ruby could have gotten out, unless she had help. That meant there had always been more demons around. Even so, another demon that was the same as Ruby, couldn't have busted her out, it would have to have been someone more powerful…someone like Lilith.

As he came to that conclusion, his stomach rolled. It had done that a lot in the last few hours. Was that there plan? While he was busy with Ruby, Lilith would go after Sam? It made him sick after so many years of training he didn't catch onto it sooner. The way Ruby moved and talked, an arrogance and manipulation always present in the black eyes. The way she was always more willing to help Sam, talk to Sam, instead of allowing the person that actually cared for him to do it.

She knew that when he was gone, Sam would have no one. Well, no one that gave him any reason to care about life anymore. In fact they both knew it, but instead of acting like it mattered to him, what happened to Sam after he was gone he dismissed it. He dismissed it because he was scared out of his mind what it was going to be like in hell. So as Sam cried out for help, begging Dean to talk about it, he just ignored it. Although the more he ignored what Sam truly wanted, Ruby was the one to pick up the pieces. Because of his selfishness, Sam was in the situation he was now.

Even when he was out of hell, Sam was still begging for some sort of help. It took him sitting here now and thinking through everything that he actually realized it. He had been so caught up with Cas and all the problems that arose when he came into his life, that he failed to notice that he was once again losing his little brother. Now he may have been too late. He had watched as the doctors face paled, he had noticed something Dean hadn't, and that was the cause for Sam to be rushed into immediate surgery. He couldn't take it anymore, he needed some air.

The air was cool and fresh. Much more relaxing opposed to the stuffy and smelly air of the emergency room. He needed someone to talk to. As he considered calling Bobby, he decided against it. Bobby would only yell and tell him everything he had just come to realize.

"Dean."

He turned around, knowing the gentle voice.

"Cas, what am I supposed to do?"

"I do not know that, you must decide that. What I do know is that Lilith was indeed in the area, we just weren't quick enough to catch her."

"No shit Sherlock, Sam could be dying and you're worried about Lilith?"

"Although I am worried about your brother's health, I am more worried about what she may have done to Sam."

He felt his blood run cold, at the very thought that Lilith actually had gotten her hands on Sam.

"What do we do if she did? What would she have done to him?"

"I can only assume she got her hands on him, it wouldn't have been difficult. She very well could have, somehow, put her own blood into Sam's bloodstream, making him more powerful than we ever imagined. Powerful enough to open the gates and release Lucifer, and powerful enough to stop angels."

He was shocked, sure he had thought Lilith had done something to Sam, but something like what Cas had just told him never crossed his mind. He could only imagine what the realization that had happened to him would do to Sam.

"Can't you do something, take it back out? You're an angel for God's sake."

"That I can't do, I do not have that ability. We must see where this new revelation takes Sam."

"You mean use him, use him to get what you want out of this war. No way in hell, is that happening. He has been through way to much, he wouldn't survive this."

Cas lowered his head. He had known talking Dean would not be easy, nothing with the Winchesters ever were. What worried him is what Dean would do to protect Sam. From the stories he had been told, Dean would do any and everything, especially now that he was blaming himself for Sam's condition.

"You must understand, we need **you** in this war."

The emphasis on you didn't go unnoticed by Dean.

"What about Sam? He just gets tossed to the sidelines, after you're done with him? I won't allow that to happen, you being a damn angel or not."

Hearing the finality in Dean's voice, he knew it was a losing battle. The boy needed to know Sam was okay, especially since Sam's health could very much deteriorate.

"I understand, allow me to talk to my superiors see if there is anything I can do. I will be in touch."

Dean nodded, heading back into the hospital. He had just sat down, when he saw Sam's doctor rushing his way. He had seen so many doctors over the years; it only took one glance at his face to know the new was bad.

**TBC…more twists and turns to come. An new chapter will be posted tomorrow!**

* * *

**XOXO,**

**Kaylee**

**P.S. I stated this earlier. PLEASE, PLEASE, REVIEW. I am updating everyday, even when I have things to do. I so far have 37 people on Story Alert for this story, out of all those people I maybe get 4 or 5 people tops off the list that actually review. I love that this story is on so many people's alerts list, but would you mind leaving a review? A short and sweet one would be wonderful. So since I know I have 37 people on the list would it be at all possible to get 60 reviews as a total for this story. That is only asking 11 people to review, but all who review are greatly appreciated. Okay so enough of this little thingy…I love all who view this story and all who review. To know my story is being recognized is pretty awesome in itself. : - )**


	9. Chapter 9

Disclaimer: I own nothing related to Supernatural. If I did, Ruby never would have been created. Plus, Sammy would be mine!

Author Note: I am most grateful to those who left me a review. I truly appreciate all of them. They give me so much positive encouragement.

On a last note I am thanking a reviewer, who gave me a wonderful idea, while she "babbled". Haha. For some damn reason I can't put your name...this damn document(I'm editing it on FF) won't let me. I'm pretty sure you know who you are.

* * *

He had expected his brother to be in bad shape, that was a given. The shape he had found in him was almost too painful to look at. There were many tubes coming and going in various places. The swaths of gauze and cloth around Sam's midsection were unmistakable. He had stitches in his head, drawing a jagged little line. He also was in the process of receiving a blood infusion, although he hoped that didn't have any serious consequences. The ventilator currently helping his brother breathed could only remind him just how badly he had failed Sam.

He sat by his little brother's bedside, refusing to leave him. He still hadn't opened his eyes, but then again the doctor said it could be a while. It scared him to think that his brother was in this bad of shape and it was his entire fault. He had kept hoping Cas would drop by for a visit, give him any information that could distract him.

He remembered clearly what the doctor had told him…

_It didn't take a genius to recognize bad news. The doctor's face definitely wasn't happy._

"_Dean, I'm Dr. Heckler, I was Sam's surgeon."_

_He shook the man's hand, anxious for the news that the doctor was about to give him._

"_To put some worries to rest, Sam made it through the surgery, with a few complications. We lost him twice, but fortunately were able to get him back rather quickly. The bullet in his shoulder was safely removed, but extensive physical therapy will have to be done. Unfortunately, infection had already set in and we're hoping the antibiotics will take care of it. As for his chest, that was an interesting injury to treat. It appears as if he has been struck with a belt or something in the manner, something that could leave welts like that. Although upon examining them closer as I started to treat them, it almost looked like human hands are what struck him."_

_A chill raced down his spine, especially since he knew whatever laid hands on his Sammy, definitely wasn't human._

"_I-I don't know. I mean is that possible for human hands to do that to a person."_

"_I've seen a lot in my line of work. I would have to say anything is possible. The injury is just raw, and was bleeding just slightly. I'm not sure how they did it, but I would definitely have to say it was no belt that struck him."_

_He felt shaky, like he was going to collapse. He decided sitting down, even though the hospital chairs were harder than rocks, was a pretty good idea. _

_"You said that you lost him twice, d-did that result in anything?"_

_The doctor sighed, obviousley in discomfort of the news about to be told._

_"Unfortunately, because of his heart stopping twice, that of course resulted in him flat lining. You needed to understand, Sam's body is extremely weak, it can't take anymore stress. So because of this, he has been put on a ventilator, just to make things easier. The poor boy take take anymore stress."_

_"A ventilator means his lungs or something is working the way it's supposed to, right?"_

_"Not always while yes, Sam is perfectly capable of breathing on his own, the immense stress that he is currently under isn't allowing him to heal as quickly, as we were hoping. It will take a while for his injuries to heal, but being on a ventilator just allows that little extra umph of energy that he has to be pushed into healing him faster."_

_He understood what the doctor was saying, but that didn't mean he liked it any. _

"_The gash on his forehead was very easily treated. Among the injuries just listed he also had two broken ribs, a sprained wrist, and a bruised kidney. I would say he is extremely lucky to be alive."_

"_Is that all then doc?"_

"_Almost, as a standard procedure I decided to run a regular full blood workout. In his entire life, has Sam ever had any blood abnormalities?"_

_Oh crap. He knew that drinking Ruby's blood shouldn't affect what showed up in blood work, but Lilith's probably would."_

"_Uh, not that I can recall. Why do you ask?"_

"_Well Sam's blood is most unusual, like nothing I have ever seen before. It appears as if some sore of virus has infected his blood, but none that I even recognized. Even after being sent down to the lab, they had no clue what it was."_

"_So, what does this mean for Sam?"_

_The doctor scratched his balding head, looking a little confused._

"_I'm not sure; all we can hope for is that this virus doesn't harm him anymore than he already is."_

_Dean knew the doc meant well, but he had no idea what he was going to do. Sam having straight demon blood was hard enough to handle, but having Lilith's blood in him, that was most definitely going to lead to terrible and catastrophic events. Oh Sam was going to be the death of him._

"_Can I see him?"_

"_Of course, right this way."_

He was pulled out of the memory, only to see Cas, standing in front of him, not looking at all too happy. He remained by Sam's side, not wanting to leave him unprotected in any way.

"I have spoken to my superiors. They do not know what to do."

"What do you mean; they don't know what to do? Aren't they supposed to know everything?"

"We angels do not control human fate, humans control their own fate. The only one who has any real say in the matter is my father."

"So, get him to come down and talk. It's not like he's doing anything else of utter importance."

He watched as Cas scowled, before speaking.

"My father is very busy with the war we have ahead of us. I am going to ask something of you, something you will not like."

He didn't want to speak; he wanted to hear the question first.

"As we have all seen what the doctor said, we know Sam is infected with Lilith's blood. He must be stopped. We need you to choose a side, your brothers or us, the people who got you out of hell?"

He couldn't speak, of course he would choose Sam, that was a given. Although abandoning Cas wasn't something he was sure he could do.

"Which side do you think I'll choose?"

He watched as Cas looked at Sam, as if studying him.

"Your brothers, I know that without doubt."

"What happens to you then?"

"I do not know. That is up to the elders to decide."

"Why exactly does Sam have to be stopped? If Lilith is destroyed nothing else matters."

"You do not understand. That is there plan, destroy Lilith. Only Sam can do that, when he destroys Lilith, Lucifer walks free."

"There must be something you can do, that God can do?"

"Only one option is possible. Stop Sam from ever getting close enough to kill Lilith. His revenge for her runs deep in his veins, he will stop at nothing when it comes to her death. We must find a way to detoxify him, allow the blood to be purely cleaned. Only then is there a chance of the angels winning."

He could only look hopelessly over at his brother. The anguish he had gone through, while left alone on this crappy Earth must have been terrible. He owed it too his brother to do whatever he could to help him.

"We'll see, but no decisions are to be made until Sam can have some input. He has been through too much, too not have any say in what happens from here on out. Understood?"

"Yes, I will return when he awakens."

Dean could only feel heaviness. He had no clue where to go anymore. The whole weight of the world was on his shoulders and he had no body to help carry it. Maybe when Sam woke up he could help. With that final thought he collapsed his head on the edge of Sam's bed and fell asleep.

* * *

Author Note: TBC…I didn't exactly expect this chapter too move in this direction, but if did. Oh well. Ha-ha. So more revelations are indeed revealed. Where do the boys go from here? What about Cas? Bobby? Where is Ruby? Lilith? So many questions still unanswered, but I assure you the answers are coming.

XOXO,

Kaylee

P.S. DON'T FORGET TO LEAVE A REVIEW. REVIEWS ARE LOVE.


	10. Chapter 10

Disclaimer: I own nothing related in the wonderfully talented and brotherly bonded world of Sam and Dean. So therefore I don't own Supernatural. 

Author Note: Once again many thanks to all the wonderful people who took the time to review. It means a lot. 

* * *

Everything was dark; and yet he could see the blood all around him. It's crimson color, haunting him, teasing him. It was unforgiving in its relentless assault against his weakened mind and body. He had no fight left to give.

Unfortunately for him, he knew the demons were counting on that. They would strike when he was weakest, when he had no fight left in him. When no one was around that would actually give a damn what happened to him. The time was drawing closer for the attack to happen; even in his drug induced pain filled state he could recognize the signs.

He felt as though he were changing, becoming more and more detached from himself. He was swimming in a sea full of evil and monsters and yet somehow he fit in. Deep down though, he didn't want to fit in. He didn't know how to make himself clean, he'd tried. There was only so much a person could do before they lost themselves completely.

He was always the one being saved. Whether it be from demons, hunters, fires, nightmares, or even himself, there was always someone around to hold his head above the water until he could find the strength to do it himself. In the darkness he could find no one. He couldn't any one screaming for him, no frantic eyes searching. It was his turn to hold his own head above the water, but how exactly does one do that?

No life lessons that he had ever been taught told him what to do when he was in the situation he was currently in. The pain that radiated from his body was unforgiving. The constant onslaught of gruesome images that plagued him 24/7, eventually after a while he began to try and figure out exactly what the images were. It was like a slideshow, and yet it somehow managed to still look like a movie. They had to mean something, anything.

He soon realized the more he tried to figure out what they were, the more he hurt. He decided to relax and not try so hard. If the images were as important as he felt they were, there true color and form would be seen. Soon he could understand and clearly see what the pictures were, but when he did though it couldn't believe what he saw.

He knew the person, would know that person anywhere at anytime. It was Dean. This made him cautious, maybe it was some sort of sick trap he was involved in. He was completely in darkness, the visions of blood and pain all around him, yet he was seeing Dean. None of it made any sense, and yet maybe that was the lesson to be learned. Maybe he was supposed to somehow find himself, find out who he truly was before he could save Dean.

With that realization all of his time was spent on Dean. Carefully analyzing, trying to pick up any detail he could. The images were gruesome; some were of Dean chained and bloody. Others were of him screaming, the pain so clearly etched on his face. He was always tied in chains, eyes wide and fearful. Someone had been doing these awful and sinister things to Dean. Why was he never told about this? He knew Dean was alive, but when had this occurred? How could he have not noticed it?

He knew the key to what was going on were the images swirling all around him. He felt as though if he could open his eyes, everything would become clear again, everything would make sense. He couldn't open his eyes, he was so tired. It felt like all the energy had been sucked from his body. He had been in whatever place he was currently located in for God knows how long, and he had yet to receive any water, food, not even angry words spat at him. He could only assume he hadn't been kidnapped.

It suddenly hit him, the images, why he had never seen them before, why no one had ever seen them before. Even when he was away at Stanford, if this had happened then, his father wouldn't have hesitated to call him. If nothing else but to help Dean heal. So it hadn't occurred then. All times after Dean had fetched him from Stanford, he had been with Dean. That only left one possible solution that made logical sense. The idea of were these images could have come from made his stomach roll, his chest heave with underlining guilt. The only way these images and things he were seeing could have been shown were if they had been from the time Dean spent in hell. That thought suddenly gave him the strength he needed, and he opened his eyes.

* * *

He hadn't had much sleep the past week. All his attention had been focused on Sam. Making sure Sam was healing and getting back to normal, well as close to normal as possible. Cas had dropped in every now and then, carefully monitoring Sam, even though he had siad he'd return when Sam woke up. It was almost as if he were expecting something to happen and wanted to be ready. At times though, he felt shivers roll down his spine, especially at night. At night it's like Sam was dreaming. His eyelids, while closed, moved rapidly back and forth. He even swore he saw Sam's mouth tighten in a straight line, which usually meant he was seriously annoyed.

He had questioned Cas on what this could mean and the angel could only reply with "His detoxification process has begun." This scared the living daylights out of him. His little brother was still in critical condition, had yet to open his eyes, and apparently his blood was detoxifying…on its own. That in itself didn't sit right with him. He looked up as Cas suddenly appeared, looking downright anxious.

"Dean, its happening sooner than I expected."

"What do you mean?"

"It took me a while to realize this, but Sam's blood shouldn't be detoxifying. If anything he should be growing stronger."

"So what does this mean that Lilith's blood is messing with Sam, in ways you didn't expect."

"I am afraid that's what it looks like. That could explain why he has yet to wake, also the way he almost seems to be dreaming."

"So, Lilith's blood is coursing through his veins, which may or may not be making him stronger. Why in the hell aren't we doing anything?"

"We can not interfere. We interfere you could lose your brother. We do not want that."

"No shit, so what do we do? We can't just sit here."

"That is exactly what we are going to do. I am going to see if I can look at what he is seeing."

He could only watch as Cas placed to fingers on Sam's forehead. The angel's expression didn't change, until he opened his eyes. He saw something he never expected to see, he saw fear.

"This is so much worse than I could have imagined."

"Why? What in the hell is happening to Sam."

"He is indeed changing, he's losing himself. In return that is allowing Lilith's blood to take hold, so much faster than it origianlly should have. The other demons blood is being washed out of Sam's blood stream. In a sense so there can't be any competition."

"Competition? Oh you have got to be fucking joking. Oh, so what is Sam possessed by Lilith now?"

"No, not yet anyway. By getting her blood into Sam, that is the beginning of her possession. If his body is used to her blood, there won't be much we can do to destroy her, without destroying Sam."

"Wouldn't that work against them. If Lilith has to die to allow Lucifer to walk free why posesse Sam?"

"I can only guess that as powerful as Sam is, he is the only one who can kill Lilith. If somehow though, Lilith is able to find a way to free Lucifer and keep your brother alive, all hell will have officially broken loose."

He felt dizzy as though he'd been whacked in the head with a baseball bat. He just got back, and he'd be damned if was going to lose Sam…again.

"You said if his body is used to Liliths blood, so we still have time?"

"Possibly, but your brother is very weak."

"I know that okay, but were running out of options. Is there a way to counter act this whole thing?"

"Possibly, it's going to take the blood of a human preferably one who has already been possessed by Ruby or Lilith, but it will also have to be the blood of a virgin."

"You mean kill an innocent person?"

"No, we just need enough blood to try and start a process of counter acting Lilith's blood."

"Okay, I'll see what I can do."

He couldn't believe what was happening, One minute he was waiting for Sam to wake up and the next, he could lose his brother all over again.

"You must trust me Dean; I will do everything in my power to save your brother. You must also trust your se-"

Cas was cut off as a gasp was heard from behind me. Sam had awoken, finally. What terrified the him most was when he got close enough to see his little brother, he wasn't looking into hazel eyes, he was looking at pitch black ones.

* * *

Author Note: TBC...Okay I must admitt, I write these chapters as I go. Everyday I get up and think where I want this story to go. Did I expect this chapter to end this way, not exactly. In the end though, it leaves doors open for so many possibilities as to where this story could end.

XOXO,

Kaylee

P.S. If you enjoyed this chapter...PLEASE LEAVE A REVIEW. It would mean so much!


	11. Chapter 11

Disclaimer: I own nothing related to Supernatural, how I wished I did. I do know it is rightfully and respectfully owned by Erik Kripke and the CW.

Author Note: So I was a little saddened to see I only had 3 reviews for Chapter 10. I can only hope my "regular" people who been with me and are so supportive will review soon. I love everyone who reviews, remember that.

* * *

Previously:

_He couldn't believe what was happening, One minute he was waiting for Sam to wake up and the next, he could lose his brother all over again._

"_You must trust me Dean; I will do everything in my power to save your brother. You must also trust your se-"_

_Cas was cut off as a gasp was heard from behind me. Sam had awoken, finally. What terrified the him most was when he got close enough to see his little brother, he wasn't looking into hazel eyes, he was looking at pitch black ones._

Now…

He felt his breathe hitch at the sight. He had seen Sam with black eyes before, and he had hoped to never ever see them again. Apparently nobody was listening when he hoped that. He didn't know what to do, should he move? Would Sam lash out? Was this even Sam or someone else entirely?

He looked at Cas, for an answer. Cas was staring as him, as if sizing him up. He walked over slowly and very cautiously. He seemed to be satisfied with what he saw.

"Your brother isn't truly awake."'

"What the hell do you mean he isn't awake, his eyes are open. Oh and might I remind you they're pitch black."

"Yes, but this is part of the, shall we call it, side affects."

"Side affects? Are you nuts, it's not like Sam is doped out on drugs."

He watched as Cas sighed, stepping closer to Sam.

"Because I have not yet talked to the elders about this, I'm going to make my own assumption on what is going on."

"Okay, let's here it."

"I believe that since Lilith's blood is indeed running through Sam's veins, she is able to control him."

"Control him; I thought you…well that is just freakin perfect."

"I think the blood, because Lilith is a demon and has seen hell, she can do what she wants with hell. Although she is not possessing Sam, her blood is, and so it is like possessing him."

"Great, so why exactly are his eyes open?"

"Memories, that's the only thing that would make sense. he is seeing something, something his mind is trying desperately to protect him from. He's seeing one of his worst fears."

He knew Sam had many fears; thunder, clowns, storms in general. So it couldn't be those, because well, those things just weren't that scary.

"What is he seeing?"

"He's seeing you. Well, your time in hell anyway. How exactly it is being shown to him, I don't know."

Hell. Sam was seeing hell. Sure they had lived in what felt like hell a few times, but nothing could compare to the real deal. What made it worse was Sam was seeing **his **time in hell. He knew the poor kid had tried desperately to understand what had happened to Dean, and know he was, only in the worst way possible. He felt sick.

"Do you think he understand what's happening to him?"

"In truth I do believe so. Your brother is a very bright soul, intriguing. If he not yet figured it out, he soon will."

"So, I guess the real question is, is what do we do now?"

"We find any information that Sam may have gathered. His hunt for Lilith has never stopped, so he must have gathered any information he could find. It may alos be best to start looking for the last host possessed by Ruby or Lilith."

He nodding, knowing he needed to do this. To make himself usefull. Sam was literally going through hell right now, and he'd be damned if he'd let him keep suffering.

"Cas, could you do me a favor."

The look was cautious and questioning, but thankfully the angel nodded.

"Stay with him, whatever you do. Do. Not. Leave. Him."

"I didn't plan to."

"Good."

He was gently squeezing the pale and thin hand of his little brother before disappearing, all the while the black eyes that stared at the ceiling were pushing him to find a cure.

* * *

He had decided to start off with Sam's motel room. It wasn't difficult to find, quite easy actually. Especially when Sam's phone had apparently been left. Although the motel Sam had picked was 2 hours away from where they had originally been staying, at least Sam had stayed in the state.

He walked into the main office, noting the young kid sitting behind the counter looking bored out of his mind.

"Hi, my name is Dean. I'm looking for a man by the name of Sam Hill."

"I'm sorry sure we aren't allowed to give out information of visitors."

"Look, Sam is my brother and he's uh, he's gone missing. He's really tall, floppy hair, hazel eyes that have matched the puppy dog look. He went missing about a week ago."

"Look, under this motel's privacy policy I can't give you that information. Now, if you would like to stay the night and talk to the manager in the morning."

"Listen kid, you don't understand. This is my brother were talking about. He. Is. Missing. I'm going to get the information I want, one way or the other. You pick the easy way or not so easy way."

The kid gulped. He quickly typed something in to the computer.

"It seems that Sam actually paid for the whole week, but never checked out. It says we have some of his belongings, let me go and get those for you."

He waited anxious to get his hands on any of Sam's stuff. The kid came back carrying Sam's old duffle, laptop, cell phone, and what appeared to be a piece of paper.

"Here's everything the maid service picked up both inside and out of your brother's room."

"Thank you." He reached his wallet pulling out enough money that would cover his stay. "Here's for the next couple of days."

"Thank you and here's your key.'

He grabbed it anxious to see what the piece of paper said.

"I hope you find your brother."

"Yeah me too."

As he entered the motel room, the butt ugly yellow wallpaper stared back at him. Sam always had to pick the crappiest places. He would get his own crap out of the car, for now though his focus was on Sam's possessions. His hands picked up the piece of paper shocked to see it was a letter.

The thoughts swirling around in his head were jumbled. So Ruby, well Kailen, had tried to warn Sam. Then Sam had gone missing. How convenient. He knew Kailen, could be the key to saving Sam. He would have to find a way to get a hold of her.

He opened Sam's laptop, anxious for any ideas on what leads Sam had for Lilith. He figured since Sam was so anal about documenting every detail that he deemed important, he would find some useful information on My Documents. As he clicked it open, he was shocked to see just how many documents there were. He scrolled down looking at some of the titles, most interested in the ones dated in 2008.

_Lilith spotted in Texas. Date: July 2__nd__, 2008_

_Ruby came, saved my assDate: July 13__th__, 2008_

_Ruby saved my ass, once againDate: July 30__th__, 2008_

_Ruby's blood-1__st__ timeDate: Sep. 14__th__, 2008_

_Lead on LilithDate: Sep. 23__rd__, 2008_

_Slept with RubyDate: Oct 24__th__, 2008_

_What would Dean think of me? Date: September 18__th__, 2008_

He stopped reading when he what the document title said. He knew he shouldn't delve into what Sam had gone through, but as much as Sam needed to understand Dean's time away, Dean needed to understand Sam's. So he opened the entry and began reading.

_Today was a rough day. All days are rough anymore. I can feel myself loosing the desperate battle to stay alive. In reality though, I'm barely living. I eat, sleep, drink, research, drink, hunt, and drink some more._

_While dad said, "Drinking on a hunt, it takes away your ability to think, to act when you need to the most." Fortunately for me, dad is no longer here. Although we fought, I still loved the man, he was my father._

_While it hurt me to lose Dad, it's killing me that Dean is gone. Sure I put on a brave face, that's what soldiers do. Although I can feel it slipping, slowly. I'm becoming something I'm unfamiliar with, and I don't like it. I have no one, I'm alone, utterly and completely._

_Sure I have Ruby, but she's a demon. I fuck her and sleep with her, but only for the warmth. Although she's not the kind of warmth I want or need. I need my brother's warmth, the teasing, the smirk, and hell even him calling me "Sammy"._

_As try as I might I can't bring him back. The hope is dwindling and soon there will be nothing left to give. When that happens, I will officially die. I hope one day Dean does come back, by a miracle from the great Lord himself, but that hope is less than an ounce._

_As much as I want Dean back, a part that is so selfish wants him to to never be able to look at me again. It scares the shit out of me that if he saw what I was becoming, it would kill him. I hate what I'm doing, because it's making me something that I've feared my entire life. I'm becoming a monster, the same thing as Ruby, and as much as I want to stop, I can't. I'm desperate for some time of help. _

_I'm so tired, right now, but also of everything. I have no one left to live for and so for that how does a person live?_

_Date: September 18__th__, 2008_

_-Sam-_

As realization hit him and looked at the date again, he realized it was the day he was brought out of hell. His chest felt heavy like he couldn't breath. Oh god, the things he had said to Sam were some of his worst fears. So now, what was he going to do?

* * *

Author Note: I LOVED writing this chapter, it was definitely the most fun for me. I hope to have lots of reviews for this chapter, to make up for Chapter 10. The reason I said, "regular" reviewers is because they're the people that review most everytime I update. I always LOVE to get a new person to join the list and become on of my "regular" reviews. Again, all who review...are so much appreciated.

XOXO,

Kaylee

_**P.S. I guess I'll say this again...if you have added yourself to my Alert/Favorite list thank you. Would. You. Please. Leave. Me. A. Review? I always try to review a story that I love because I know as an Author myself it gives the writer inspiration. So all those who have added me if your a writer yourself, you probably don't like opening up your Inbox which may say "20 New" and have 4 of them be reviews. It just all around sucks. I am going to be extremely busy tomorrow, but I WILL update. Since I update everyday, could you be so kind as to leave me a review? It would truly mean a lot.**_


	12. Chapter 12

Disclaimer: I own nothing related to Supernatural, oh how I wish I did.

Author Note: I'm having a blast writing it, but what about you guys? Are you guys enjoying reading it? As always a grateful thank you to those who have reviewed, I love all of you. I'm so sorry for not updating over the weekend. I was extremely busy. I had my best friends birthday party and then I went to her house afterwards. Then I had to get up at 7:30 the next morning to get ready to leave. I went to St. Louis and watched a Cardinal game…they lost. Then my brother had the privilege of being able to stay afterwards and actually play on the Cardinal field, it was a pretty awesome experience for the whole baseball team and everyone involved. So I got home at 10:30 and went straight to bed, but I'm back. I'm not sure how good this chapter was…I'll let you all decide. 

* * *

He woke groggy; he had no idea how long he had been asleep. He guessed a few hours. The light from Sam's laptop glared at him, he forgot to close the damn thing. The guilt was immense that swirled in his body. He didn't even know the condition of Sam at the moment.

Even though his brain was screaming at him to stop, he reached for the laptop. His heart told him he needed to look at one or two more entries to gain a little more insight into exactly what Sam went through. What he was reading could only give him a minimum insight into what Sam went through. He scrolled through some more entries with in the year of 2009.

_Dean's Fear-Date: October 24__th__, 2008_

_A Broken Promise-Date: November 1__st__, 2008_

_Uriel's Warning-Date: November 8__th__, 2008_

_Deaf Ear's-Date: February 3__rd__, 2009_

He was known to be a curious person. He clicked on the first document made in 2009.

_It's always fear. It's everyday of every week. Fear that swirls around me like a constant reminder of my failure. I failed my brother and in so doing for I failed everything that he ever stood for._

_It disgusts me deeply what I have become. I can feel myself slipping off the reservation of normal. I left everything to have normal and now I'm the farthest thing from it. It's like a disease that spreads, flowing so quickly you have no way to stop it. I try and fail every time._

_I figured now that Dean is back we'd be working a relationship out. While the relationship is so weak now, I'm scared to breathe around him. I can't help him, I try, but he's stubborn. I also know that he is scared out of his mind. Maybe he's not ready to tell me what he went through, but he's also scared of my reaction? As much as I am trying to make us brothers once more, I also need help and support. ._

_The help I ask for falls on deaf ear's, on Dean's deaf ear's. I need him to show me, the light at the end of the tunnel. I don't know what to do anymore. Ruby tends to show up at the worst possible moments, Dean doesn't trust her and I don't blame him. A part of me doesn't trust her either, but she's all I have to lean on for support and warmth and at this point I'll take what I can get. _

_Dean's moody, which doesn't surprise me. While yes, I promised to myself I would stop with the lies, I don't know if I can. The truth can be brutal, plain and simple. So I guess a child like part of me is protecting Dean, by not telling him the truth, and yet I know I'm driving the wedge farther and farther between us. _

_The siren did a nasty job on Dean. I know that, but I also know that the words I spoke weren't true. It kills me to know that Dean is willing and ready to believe them. He said we "were good", but I can see were not. It wouldn't take a genius to figure it out. While I play with the idea of leaving, trying to start over, I know I can't. Whether Dean wants to admit it or not we need each other and for that I'll sacrifice everything else, no matter whether it makes sense or not._

_Date: February 3__rd__, 2009_

_-Sam-_

He stopped reading as the letter ended. He had known or at least assumed Sam been having difficulties lately. He was quite and reserved. No more pressure about what he had gone through, it scared him. It scared him to realize Sam had been living in his own hell for the past who knows how long, and he had failed to notice. He had failed Sam, and he knew Sam deserved so much better.

He decided to put his guilt in the back of his mind. What mattered right now was finding anything or anyone that could help Sam. He suddenly remembered the piece of paper that was given in all of Sam's belongings. Once he found it he opened it.

The whole level of the situation came down on him. The host that Ruby had invaded was alive and appeared to be doing very well. This could be the lead he was looking for. He desperately needed to get into contact with her, but didn't even know where to begin.

He eyed Sam's phone that was currently lying on the ratty comforter of the bed. It could be possible that "Ruby's" number was in it, but if it wasn't he had no where to go with it. Sure Cas, may be of some help, but he knew as little about her as Dean did.

There of course was also the chance that the number had been deleted. He could only hope that it hadn't. He decided to take a chance and picked it up. As he scrolled through the numbers, he felt a immense sort of relief, wash over him when he saw "_Ruby", _still listed in the contacts. He decided not to worry about, her even actually being in his contacts in the first place. As he hit send, he could only hope this would work.

"Hello."

His breath caught at the recognizable voice.

"Uh, hi this is, this is Dean Winchester."

He could hear the gasp on the other line.

"Um, may I ask why you're calling?"

"Yes, but let me make sure of something. Did you give my brother anything?"

He figured she most likely wasn't possessed and even if she was, a demon wouldn't go through that much trouble to actually warn the person, they wanted in the first place.

"I gave him a letter. I wanted him to know what I know."

"That's great, um, would you mind if we met up?"

"I don't know who's to say you're not going to kill me?"

"Look, I won't hurt you, I promise. Something's happened to Sam and I need, I need your help."

"They got to him didn't they? Damn it. Stupid fucking demons, I should have gotten there faster."

He was surprised to hear the anger in her voice over Sam. He hoped this meant she would help him.

"They did indeed get him, it was my fault."

"Dean, I don't know you, not really. I do know that Sam is going to be in a lot of trouble. I'll help in anyway I can."

"Thank you, where do you want to meet?"

"How about the little coffee shop a few blocks over. We can discuss everything there."

"Okay, I'll be there soon. Why are you helping me?"

"Dean, I've begun to understand that the things that happen in our lives, we sometimes don't ask for. While I never asked to be possessed, Sam never asked to lose you. We go through these things, which can either make us stronger or tear us down. I want you to understand that you are Sam's only hope. I can only do so much, and what I can do, isn't much at all. Sam needs you more than ever, I just hope you realize that."

He sat stunned at the genuine concern this woman had.

"I-uh, I'll see you in a few minutes."

"Will do, bye Dean."

"Bye."

He didn't feel like he had the right to call her, her real name, the name that made her human. He had only seen her as evil and mistrusting for so long, it seemed like that's all he would ever see her as. He could only hope that the meeting would change that.

* * *

Author Note: Ugh, I don't like this chapter. I think it was somewhat of a filler, but not totally, Well tell me what you think. Also no one is finding mistakes are they? As this story continues, there isn't anything that doesn't make sense. like maybe in the beginning I said one thing, but later on might have unintentionally switched a little bit without realizing it? Hope that sentence makes sense. 

XOXO,

Kaylee

**P.S. Here it goes again. I was very pleased to see I had 8 reviews for Chapter 11, but man I was hoping to have 100 reviews by now, and maybe more than that. So I can only ask for 90 reviews by next chapter. That is only asking for 12 people to review, so not a lot. It seems that while yes, people are enjoying this story; it seems that it isn't being recognized. So far this story has 40 alerts, so why not any more reviews than 6-8 reviews per chapter? If you don't like reading WIP that is one thing, but this story is updated almost daily, but there are the occasional acceptations. So I can only ask for more reviews, it seems I only get a larger number of reviews when I post these damn things and I don't like having to post them. Every author wants there work recognized, especially by people that share there love for the same genre, so I am only asking for that!**


	13. Chapter 13

Disclaimer: I still own nothing related to Supernatural.

Author Note: Ok, so there is going to be many hugs and thanks going around. I freakin love all of you, you are all completely and totally amazing. Everyone who reviewed is so appreciated. Oh and I'm sorry for not updating for the past few days, I was stuck on where to take this story. So in the end this chapter is what happened. Ugh, for some bloody, god forsaken reason, it this damn thing won't allow me to put this name in-Under the special thanks the 2nd name should be: Bloody hell, this thing is annoying.

~Special Thanks~

**(sweetsmart0505)**-Thank you for the encouraging words and your ideas.

**()-**The thanks that I can give you isn't enough. Thank you for the encouraging ideas, words, and conversations we had about our Sammy/Jared.

**(Anjelicious)-**You girly, are amazing. I especially can't thank you enough for taking the time to review every chapter, it means so, so much.

* * *

As he entered the coffee shop he felt nervous. His instincts as a hunter told him to be alert. He immediately took in his surroundings. There were four people total in the shop. Two people were behind the counter. An older gentleman was sitting in the back and there was of course Ruby.

She was also sitting in the back. He hated to admit, but she looked better. Her long hair was pulled into a high ponytail. The snug fitting dark purple top, revealed a more normal side. All he had ever seen her in was black, with the occasional gray thrown in.

As he got to the table and sat down she finally looked at him. They both seemed to be calculating each other, making sure the truth was the only thing that was going to be told.

"I didn't think you'd show up."

"I'm not here for you; I'm here to get whatever information I can."

"Of course, and I know you don't trust me, but I don't want to be filed into the category of "evil", because I'm not."

He stared at her. The dark brown eyes stared back a sort of innocence shining through.

"I don't understand why you want to help us? I mean, okay, you were possessed by Ruby and did terrible things, but that doesn't give you a real reason to help."

"I-I don't know, it's hard to explain to someone that wouldn't understand."

"Understand? I understand plenty of things. So, you feel like you have an obligation to Sam? You were possessed there is nothing you could have done differently to stop anything. I'm thankful that you lived through the process, I am, but I find it hard to believe, after everything I've been through."

"Look, whether you want my help or not, I'm going to give it. I know the reasons are hard to understand and don't make a whole lot of sense, but in the end if Sam stays alive that's all that matters. I know we have much to discuss, but you really wouldn't have come here had you not needed something from me."

He stared at her in shock. She was open about what she thought and felt and he could appreciate it. He studied her carefully, if there was anything he couldn't tell that was off, he figured Cas could.

"Okay, Sam's in bad shape. Well terrible shape actually. Lilith got to him and really messed him up. He's going through a detoxification process as you could call it. It's, uh, really long story, but your right I do need something from you."

She nodded, not even taking time to question what he may need.

"I need blood, your blood. Your were possessed by both Lilith and Ruby. Your blood may be the only thing that can save Sam. It would also have to be the blood of a, of a virgin."

She grabbed his hand and he couldn't find it in himself to pull away.

"I guess it's a good thing I'm saving myself for marriage."

He looked up, not quite believing what he was hearing. It seemed that everything was looking up.

"Yeah, I guess so. I know I may seem like a bastard at least to you. I don't trust easily, especially anyone concerning Sam, but you seem to be an alright person."

She smiled easily.

"I guess you should get to the hospital and see that brother of yours."

"Yeah, you're not coming?"

She smiled gently, it looking so much different compared to the usual smirk he had been accustomed to.

"I will, but I think we both need to figure some things out. When you need me call me and I'll be at the hospital as soon as I can."

"Thank you Kailen."

"Your welcome."

As they both walked out of the coffee shop and headed their separate ways, he suddenly felt hopeful.

**SN~SN~SN~SN~SN~SN~SN~SN~SN~SN~SN~SN~SN~SN~SN~SN~SN~SN~SN~SN~SN~SN~SN~SN~SN~SN~SN~SN~SN~SN~SN~SN~SN~SN~SN~SN~**

He arrived back at the hospital and entered Sam's room, all the hope he had just had minutes before vanished. The state of which Sam in was still the same. He looked lifeless, hooked up to all the machines. He noticed Cas standing in the corner, looking out the window.

"There has been no change in your brother Dean, I'm sorry."

"Yeah, I can tell. Has the doctor been in?"

"Yes, he's worried about infection. Sam has been put on a higher dose of antibiotics."

He sighed sitting down next to his Sammy and gently held his hand. He noticed that Sam's eyes were closed.

"Why are his eyes closed?"

"I don't know, after you left they just closed. They may only be open when your around because it is your memories he is seeing."

"Oh. I found someone who can help."

He watched as Cas turned around, apprehension on his face.

"Her name is Kailen. She tried to warn Sam that demons were after him, she wants to help."

"She was a host?"

"Yes, for both Ruby and Lilith. She is also a virgin."

"Good, why is she not here?"

"I don't know, but she'll be here shortly. We both had some things to take care of."

"Yes, I suppose you did. You're sure she isn't possessed?"

"Cas, what do you want me to tell you? I think I would know if she was I mean I spent nearly forty years surrounded by demons."

Cas's face fell, revealing guilt.

"Yes I know. If you trust, believe she can help your brother, then that's good enough for me. I will watch her though, very closely when she first enters this room, just be sure."

"Okay, um, could I have a minute alone with Sam?"

"Of course, I shall return shortly."

He didn't know how Cas did it, but he was gone in the blink of an eye. He looked at Sam, noticing the still closed eyes. He needed to see the hazel eyes of his little brother. The ones that were always concerned and questioning. The ones that desperately wanted to help and save everyone. He didn't know what to do at this moment.

"Sam, I don't if you can hear me, but I hope you can. I miss you; you shouldn't be lying here in this damn bed. You should be annoying and geeky. I am so sorry, this is all my fault. You deserve so much better than I what I've provided for you. You deserve your white picket fence, a beautiful wife, two kids and a dog. You never asked for any of this and for that I'm sorry."

He hoped desperately that the words were getting through to Sam. The body in front of him remained motionless and still. Only the sounds of the machines were echoing in the small room.

"Okay, I get that I deserve the silence. What I said to you never should have been said. I want to swear to you that I meant none of it. We've both been through hell, literally and figuratively, and so were stuck right now. I'm gonna promise you though that if you can fight this we will be brothers again. I want that more than anything. I know it'll take time to rebuild trust and the stability that we used to have, but we can do it. I mean we are Winchesters after all."

Sam remained motionless and he was growing frustrated. As he gripped the pale hand tighter he allowed the tears to fall. He looked at his brother's face through wet eyes and watched as the eyes of his brother's slowly began to open. He quickly wiped his eyes and waited. What he saw made his breath catch. Instead of the pitch black eyes he had seen earlier, he was now staring at the hazel eyes of his little brother.

* * *

Author Note: TBC...Oooo...a cliffy. Bahaha. I really enjoyed writing this chapter, I hope it wasn't poorly done. It took me forever to write and figure out what I wanted to do with it. In the end though, this is the finished product and that's how it shall remain. : ). Anyways drop a review, they are love. XD. Alright I am just slightly pissed...the 2nd person who should get thanks is **R.I.T.S.A.M** .(The name is suppossed to be all lower case and not have periods after every letter, well all except the RIT part...but this god forsaken website won't allow me to put the name up like it should be)

XoXo,

Kaylee


	14. Chapter 14

Disclaimer: I own nothing related to Supernatural…it all respectfully belongs to Erik Kripke.

Author Note: Oh. My. Goodness. Everyone who reviewed is simply astounding. I can't thank each and every one of you enough. Aw, you guys are just so awesome. Oh ans sorry for not reviewing for a few days, I was super busy with the holiday weekend. I hope everyone had a happy and safe 4th of July. = )

~Special Thanks~

**(Anjelicious)-**Okay so I asked for ideas and we had the exact same idea for this chapter. So creepy…were in the world are Sam and Dean? Lol. I enjoy giving credit to those who truly help me out in my stories when I am in a bind, and even though we had the same idea for this chapter, ultimately I am giving the credit to her.

**(Kerushii Hatake)-**Hi Kels, so yes I am giving you a big thank you. You are being the bestest friend ever, not that you aren't always…(=. Thanks for the encouraging reviews and taking time to review every chap.

**(TraSan)**-Thank you so much for the very thoughtful and encouraging PM. I took everything you said to heart. I guess it took knocking some sense into me, although sometimes it is needed. ( =

**(samOandOhannah)**-Thanks for the laugh, it was needed. Loved the comment about it soon getting "chicky-flicky". = )

Now with all the thanks for those people shall we get on with this story?

* * *

He looked at his brother's hazel eyes, not quite believing what he was seeing. He blinked and rubbed furiously at his eyes, thinking it was a dream or a sick joke. When he opened them again and the eyes remained the hazel color, he felt his own tears gather. He squeezed Sam's hand and let the tears fall from the relief.

The hazel eyes seemed to be unseeing, almost glossed over. This worried him, made his mind run crazy with what could be going on inside of Sam's head. The knock at the door made him cautious. As it was opened he sighed when he noticed it was only…Kailen.

"Hi Dean."

He nodded not wanting to leave watching Sam for a minute.

"You-you could pull up a chair if you'd like."

The screech as the chair being pulled across the floor made him wince. He always hated that sound.

"How is he?"

Kailen's voice was soft as if she were scared to touch Sam or speak to loud.

"He's not good. The doctor's really worried about infection."

He glanced at her seeing her nod.

"What needs to be done to help him?"

"I told you that already."

"I know, but how will it be taken and how much?"

He felt angry all of a sudden, the tone of her voice wasn't sitting well with him. Sure it was gentle, but there was something underlining it.

"I don't know a friend of mine is going to help with that."

"I see…he looks like death warmed over."

He watched her, studied her. She sat on the other side of the bed, almost seeming to observe Sam. The green orbs seemed fascinated by the man lying in the bed, like she knew more than he did.

"I thought I was supposed to call you when I needed you."

He studied her face as surprise swept across it.

"Yeah, but I was on my way out of town and wanted to get this over with."

"Get this over with? I thought you were all about helping my brother."

"I am, why else would I be here?"

"Why don't you tell me?"

As Kailen rose so did he. His instincts as a hunter and the alarm bells that came with the job were going off. The way she moved was coy, like she was an animal stalking its prey. He looked at his brother the hazel orbs still glazed over, apparently seeing nothing.

"Look, when is your friend going to be here?"

"I don't know."

In truth he didn't know where the hell Castiel was. It was making him nervous not having the extra protection around.

"Well, it's probably a good thing your angel isn't here, otherwise my plan wouldn't work."

Before he could react he was thrown against the wall, his body pinned. It felt like an invisible force was pinning him down, making it harder and harder to move and breathe. He looked up and thought he had died. The milky white orbs stared back at him.

"Hi ya Deano, it's so nice to see you again."

"You bitch."

He felt a growl force its way past his rage boiling inside him far outweighed any fear he had.

"Such a dirty mouth talkin' to a lady like that. Then again you always did speak dirty."

The smirk that graced the person's lips in front of him was cruel and sinister.

"I'm going to fuckin kill you."

"I'd like to see you try."

He closed his eyes wishing and praying beyond all hope that Cas would come. Now more than ever he literally needed an angel. He hadn't noticed Lilith/Kailen standing near Sam's bed. She stroked his hair and he felt the bile rise in his throat.

"What the hell do you want with him?"

She turned, smiling cruelly.

"See, there's no use in stalling. I know you already know."

He watched and prayed desperately that some form of help would arrive. His brother had no way to defend himself and the damn hell spawn in the room was going to get her ass kicked…if he could find a way off the wall. He was desperate to know exactly what Lilith wanted with Sam at least in this moment.

"Where's that angel of yours?"

He closed his eyes, willing a lie to come forth from his lips, unfortunately he had nothing. He could come up with nothing because with out knowing where in the world Cas truly was how was he supposed to make up a place?

"Get. Away. From. Him"

His eyes flashed open because standing in front of him was Cas. It was about damn time he showed up.

"Aw, like I'm scared of little ol' you."

He couldn't see Cas's face, but the way his shoulders tensed, could only make him guess how unhappy he was.

"I am warning you, you are not to harm the boy in any way. If you do, I can guarantee you will greatly wish you hadn't."

The laugh that escaped Lilith/Kailen was harsh and cruel. It reminded him all over again that this thing wasn't human, just a monster. He watched in horror as a knife was brought out and pressed against the pale arm of his brother. The blood dripped, its crimson color making him want to vomit, or just fly across the room and kill the bitch standing over his brother.

It didn't take but a half a second for Cas to be across the room and slamming Lilith into the wall. The cheap plaster cracked and splintered under the force that was exerted. He dropped to the cold tile floor, not questioning anything, but getting to his brother. He stood protectively in front of his brother, pressing his hand against the wound. It wasn't bleeding as heavily, but he wasn't taking any chances. His eyes quickly turned back to the situation that was unfolding.

"You can't kill me, you're pathetic and weak. You're nothing."

"Nothing matters but protecting the two men in this room and I would never let any harm come to them that can be prevented."

He watched as the milky white orbs became slits. The hand that was pressed against Lilith's forehead appeared to be anything, but gentle. He watched as the light flashed behind the milky white orbs before the body went limp. As Cas gentle brought the body towards him, cradling it he appeared weak and guilty looking.

"I am so sorry for my incompetence. I should have been here sooner."

"Cas, you saved us, for that I will forever be grateful. I didn't know where you were or if you would show."

"I am terribly sorry about that. I was talking with the elders and they refused to let me help you until it turned dire."

"Why though, we could have both been killed?"

"The emotions that are running high in this situation, they feel I am becoming too attached. They fear I am willing to do anything and everything to keep both of you safe."

He looked at the man standing in front of him and felt proud. Whether this man was human or not he was so much more than he had ever expected him to be.

"Cas, no matter what happens I will always be in your debt for what you've done for us."

He watched as a small smile, a rare occasion, appeared on his face.

"I thank you for that, but we have much more dire measures to attend to. We must get this process started or I'm afraid we may be to late."

He nodded fear coursing through his veins.

"Okay…okay."

"Is there a safe place we can go?"

He thought and knew of only one place and person that he would trust with his life and with Sam's life. That person was of course Bobby.

* * *

Author Note: TBC...I'm so horrible, I know. = ). I really loved writing this chapter, it was so much fun. Who expected that with Kailen? What about Cas's protectiveness? Alrighty, leave me a review! XD

XoXo,

Kaylee


	15. Chapter 15

Disclaimer: I own nothing related to Supernatural, it still and forever will always belong to Eric Kripke and company. I am simply borrowing.

Author Note: -waves and hands out lots of different sweets-. Okay so you guys are all so amazing, there are no words to describe it. I can not truly thank each and every one of you all enough. While I may not send you review replies back to everyone, you are **all **most appreciated in taking the time to review.

* * *

_Previously…_

"_Is there a safe place we can go?"_

_He thought and knew of only one place and person that he would trust with his life and with Sam's life. That person was of course Bobby._

Now…

It had taken a miracle for the plan they had devised to go off without a hitch. Sam was still too weak to actually be moved. His vitals, while stable, didn't mean anything. There was still a high risk of an infection forming and if there was no reliable doctor around all work and effort that had been put into protecting Sam would be for nothing.

After the scare with Lilith, there were to be no chances taken when it came to Sam. While he was scared for his own safety, the safety of his little brother far outweighed the idea of any potential harm his way. Cas had not left, he refused to. The blame that weighed heavily on his shoulders was not going to be easily lifted. Although because of Cas's quick thanking they were now on there way to Bobby's. it also didn't hurt matters that Cas was of course an angel.

Cas had decided to use what powers he could to make Sam just strong enough to make the trip. It was risky messing with demon blood, especially that of Lilith's. In then end though it was truly the only option they had. He had watched anxiously as Cas had laid his hand on Sam's forehead. It reminded him that just hours before the same thing had been done to Lilith.

He watched as Sam's closed and his whole body seemed to jolt. The machine's buzzed and he looked at Cas.

"Shut the door and lock it."

He did as he was told not wanting to take the risk and have there cover blown.

"What are you doing to him?"

"I'm healing as many injuries as possible. I'm also trying to prevent a break in his mind to allow it to rest, even for just a few hours."

"So he'll wake up?"

"No, that won't be possible until his injuries fully heal. It also may not happen until his blood is back to normal."

"So your saying that he could always be like this, a vegetable?"

"No Dean, but it's safer this way. With the powers that I've used it guarantees that Lilith can't get anywhere close to him. That will buy us precious time to find an answer."

He sighed looking over to where an unconscious Kailen lay on the couch.

"What about her?"

"We take her with us. Dean she may be the only key to saving your brother and we must keep her just as safe."

He nodded his brain swirling with information. It felt like his brain couldn't be crammed with anymore.

"So how do we get out of here without anyone noticing?"

"You take Sam, I'll take the girl. You stay behind me and they can't see you. If you are seen Sam is still protected and it'll only appear like you're carrying nothing."

"So we're invisiable?"

"Sort of, imagine it being like a cloak."

"Like Harry Potter?"

"Who?"

"Never mind, I forgot you don't get to watch much TV."

Cas eyes him seeming slightly amused. It worried him to know just how to get all the tubes out of his brother. He wasn't a doctor and it wasn't like he could just go ask one to remove everything.

"How do we get Sam disconnected from all of these tubes?"

"I'll do it, you just check the girl."

He walked over and pressed two fingers to Kailen's neck. The pulse was steady, which was a good thing. He knew she had been through hell and back. He didn't even know if she would be willing to help. He was confused and tired. He just wanted his brother back.

"Dean, we need to go."

He turned around surprised to see Cas gently cradling Sam. Pale skin and long brown mop of hair made him cringe. The poor kid had lost so much weight and he really needed a haircut. As Sam was handed over to him he held him close and protectively. He hadn't been this close to Sam in a long time. At least the hazel eyes were now closed because if they were opened it would make it so much harder to do this.

Cas stepped in front of him and opened the door.

"Follow me, don't make a sound."

He did as he was told and could only look as people walked right by him. Not questioning one thing. He had never seen anything like this, the power to be invisible, but not invisible. It confused him but he had more pressing matters.

Before he realized it they had reached his beloved baby. Her black and sleek shine gave him comfort. For an instance he felt like he was home. As he gently put Sammy in the back, for one moment in his entire life he didn't feel like driving. He needed to be close to Sam, to know what he was alright.

"Cas, could you drive. I mean I hope you know how to drive a car."

"I do know how to drive."

As the car was started and gently moved out of the hospital he felt exhausted. He closed his eyes and for the first time in a long time he slept.

* * *

He opened his eyes at the persistent of someone poking him. He looked up to see Cas standing over him, his face relaxed.

"We are here. I already took the girl inside."

He sat up and noticed Bobby's truck was gone. He cracked his neck and looked over at Sam. His little brother seemed to be sleeping peacefully. As he gently maneuvered Sam into his arms he knew they were ok. Bobby's place was the closet thing to home and it felt good to be back.

As he entered the house he quickly took Sam to the spare bedroom. He had noticed Kailen on the couch and decided to let her be. As he entered the room, he felt pure relief wash over him. He quickly pulled the old comforter down and laid Sam on the sheets. As he pulled the comforter back over his brother, it was nice to see him looking so relaxed. The worry and the pain off his face. He jumped as he turned around to see Cas standing in the doorway.

"You have got to quit doing that."

"I'm sorry. What do we do now?"

"We wait and hope that Bobby is in an understanding mood."

* * *

Author Note...TBC. Eek...I can't believe I've reached 15 chapters. I'm so happy. Alright so this chapter didn't have a lot of explosiveness in it, but Sam is out of the hospital and the boys have reached Bobby's. So things have to get better right? Anyways please review...they are all most appreciated. = D

XoXo,

Kaylee


	16. Chapter 16

Disclaimer: As much as I wish I did, I own nothing related to Supernatural.

Author Note: Ah….thank you to everyone who was kind enough to stop and drop a review. I'm glad to see people are still enjoying this baby. Lol. Oh and sorry for not updating for a few days, I was really, really busy. Oh and this chapter is pretty short and er...bad. Anyways please leave a review and enjoy reading.

* * *

Previously…

_AS he entered the house he quickly took Sam to the spare bedroom. He had noticed Kailen on the couch and decided to let her be. As he entered the room, he felt pure relief wash over him. He quickly pulled the old comforter down and laid Sam on the sheets. As he pulled the comforter back over his brother, it was nice to see him looking so relaxed. The worry and pain off his face. He jumped as he turned around to see Cas standing in the doorway. _

"_You've got to quit doing that."_

"_I'm sorry. What do we do now?"_

"_We wait and hope Bobby is in an understanding mood."_

Now…

They had been waiting for an hour and still no Bobby. It worried him slightly, but he figured Bobby was out doing something that he needed to do. He was antsy…wanting to fill Bobby in on everything. It also worried him that Cas had never actually met Bobby and vice versa. Although if you count them actually meeting and Bobby getting knocked out then that meeting went well.

"Dean are you in here?"

He looked up as Bobby entered carrying a stack of books and a case of beer. He walked over and took a few of the books, and laid them on the rickety table. As Bobby returned he was pulled into to a hug. It gave him hope to know the man was here and was going to help them.

"Where's that brother of yours."

"Upstairs…look that's why we're here."

"We?I only see you."

"You can come out now."

He watched as Cas entered the room, slowly as if making sure it was safe. He had suggested that Cas hide on the edge of the stairs, he didn't want Bobby pulling out a rifle. Bobby's eyes widened when he saw Cas.

"Who are you?"

"I am Castiel, an angel of the Lord. I am sorry about the last time we meant it was imperative that I knock you unconscious."

"Ah…so you're the angel Dean talks about. I see."

"Yes, but the boys need your help."

Bobby looked at Dean eyes not surprised but slightly filled with concern.

"I figured that. They never just come around to talk."

Bobby smiled gently motioning for Cas to sit on the couch. Thankfully Kailen had been moved into the same room Sam was in just in the other bed. He left the room returning with three beers. He handed two beers to the men sitting in front of him, one to Dean and the other to Castiel. Dean quickly opened the bottle and drank the offered liquid. Cas just held the bottle and stared at it.

"You can drink it you know."

"I do not need to drink anything."

"Fine, give it to me and I'll drink it."

Cas automatically handed the bottle over and he took it sitting it next to his opened bottle. Bobby seemed to be studying the exchange, watching carefully.

"Look, Bobby Sam's in trouble. Big trouble."

"Alright give me the story."

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

It had taken close to two hours before everything was explained. The questions were far and few between, Bobby was content enough just to listen. It took a while for everything to sink in before he turned to Dean, anger shining in his brown eyes.

"You stupid, stupid bastard. How dare you say those things to Sam? Yes, a demon was involved but you should have known something was wrong. How could you trust some bar slut demon witch over your own brother?"

"Bobby, I was stupid I know that. It's my fault that Sam is in the condition he is, struggling to live. If I could go back I would, I promise that. I can't though so now I have to make it up to him, let him know that everything is okay. I know I haven't been the brother he needs, but I'm going to start trying."

"Dean, I love both you boys like my own. Dean, I hate being strict with you, but boy you have no idea what Sam went through when you were gone. That boy died without you, he turned to alcohol and recklessness. He pushed everyone away, and I felt like I'd failed. I failed you and I failed your daddy. I am sorry for that because maybe if I had tried harder Sam wouldn't be in the condition he was in."

He couldn't speak too shocked at Bobby's confession. All of what Bobby had said he knew, especially concerning the first part was true. But that last bit was far from true.

"Bobby, I've already figured out what you said. I know I screwed up and big time. Bobby what happened with Sam now or all that time I was gone is not your fault. I want and need you to understand that. Sam doesn't blame you and neither do I. Sam is as stubborn as they come; you and I both know that. Everything is going to be okay."

Bobby grunted gently before taking a swig of his beer. The whole time Cas had remained silent. Bobby seemed embarrassed by his confession and outburst but it didn't bother anyone in the room.

"Alright, well know that things are all settled, while don't we figure out how to help that brother of yours."

He couldn't help but smile at Bobby's words. As they all three headed upstairs he knew deep, deep down everything would somehow work itself out.

* * *

Author Note: Ugh...I'm so sorry this chapter wasn't my best. I had so much trouble in knowing where to go with this. Ugh, I hope I didn't dissappoint anyone, I feel like I did. D =. I will try to make it up to everyone when I update next time. Anyways please leave me a review...good or -gulp- bad. Oh and sorry for the pure shortness of it, that goes along with not knowing where to take it. 

Love,

Kaylee


	17. Author Noteplease read!

**My Dear Readers,**

**I just want to apologize for not updating this story in nearly two weeks. Life has been crazy and hectic. I've been so busy. I am leaving for a "mini" vacation if you will here in the next half hour or so. So that might help explain why I haven't updated or at least tried to any this week.**

**Also I wasn't sure where to go with this. I don't feel at all like I'm losing this story, it's just I'm not sure of where I want the next few chapters to head. Any ideas? I will update next week sometime, I promise. Hopefully being away and relaxing will give me a chance to clear my head and think of some story ideas.**

**Finally, I just want to say thank you to everyone who has reviewed so far. You guys are all so supportive and awesome. It makes me so happy to know I have people who actually care about my writing and me. I always love to see new people reviewing, so if you feel like reviewing. Please do! They would be so very much appreciated and needed! : )**

**XoXo,**

**Kaylee**


	18. Chapter 18

**Disclaimer: I still own nothing related to Supernatural. I wish I did though, but it is all Eric Kripke's and the CW's. I am just borrowing. **

**Author Note: Alrighty so here is a brand new and lenghty chapter. I hope it makes up for the AN that was Chapter 17. I also hope this chapter is more accetable than chapter 16, I know that one was pretty crappy. I just hope everyone is enjoying this story and will continue to do so until it is finished!**

**P.S. I've had a rough couple of days, mostly heartbreaking. I don't really want to explain...don't want to be reminded. So if you review this chapter, just take it easy. : ). In the end though, all reviews are love, which I need really bad right now. **

* * *

_Chapter 16-Ending-Flashback. _

_Bobby grunted gently before taking a swig of his beer. The whole time Cas had remained silent. Bobby seemed embarrassed by his confession and outburst but it didn't bother anyone in the room._

"_Alright, well know that things are all settled, while don't we figure out how to help that brother of yours."_

_He couldn't help but smile at Bobby's words. As they all three headed upstairs he knew deep, deep down everything would somehow work itself out._

* * *

Now…

They walked into the room that occupied both Sam and Kailen. It appeared that both were sleeping soundly. Bobby walked over to Sam as if studying him, trying to think of something that would work, magically fix him.

"What exactly needs to be done to clear Sam's blood?"

The question was only directed towards Cas. He turned towards the angel standing next to him. Cas's face seemed to be in concentration, he could almost see the wheels turning.

"It's going to have be direct contact with Samuels blood. Blood will have to be taken from Kailen, she was obviously possessed by both demons. Although blood is also going to have to be taken from somewhere else, someone that is family."

He gulped knowing he was the only option. He would do whatever he had to for Sam to recover and get well. It just worried him what exactly would have to be done, in the end, for Sam to be well and back to his old self.

"What do I have to do?"

Bobby remained quite taking in all the information. He watched the exchange between the angel and Dean hoping that whatever needed to be done would be. He couldn't stand it if, in the end, they ended up losing Sam all over again.

"He needs your blood. It's never been touched by evil. You've never been possessed; you're the only family he has left."

"Okay, just tell me what I have to do and let's do it."

"Dean you must understand even if we do all of this there is the possibility Sam won't make it. He is much weaker than I would like. Even if the blood from both you and Kailen is transferred it doesn't mean it will work, it may make him weaker."

"I know, but Cas he's the only I have left. The only thing I have left to fight for and I won't lose him again, I can't. If this doesn't work then you'll have no one left to lead you, no one left that will help you."

"Why is that?"

"Without Sam, I'm as good as dead."

Both remaining men watched as Dean walked out of the room.

* * *

He sat on Bobby's front porch nursing another beer. Thoughts swirled in his head at what the future may hold. _A future without Sam. _He wouldn't lose his little brother, not again. He refused too. He meant what he said, that if Sam died he was dead as well. He would find a way to finish himself off and no angel could stop him.

"_He is indeed changing, he's losing himself. In return that is allowing Lilith's blood to take hold, so much faster than it originally should have. The other demons blood is being washed out of Sam's blood stream. In a sense so there can't be any competition."_

Competition? Sam should never have to be put through any type of competition that could kill him, especially when it was killing him slowly. It made him sick to recall Cas's words that had been so clearly spoken without hesitation, like he knew more than he was possibly letting on. He trusted Cas though, at least enough to listen to him.

"…_By getting her blood into Sam, that is the beginning of her possession. If his body is used to her blood, there won't be much we can do to destroy her, without destroying Sam."_

He felt small tendrils of fear sneak there way into his body. The words that Castiel had spoken were clear as a bell in his head. The idea that Sam could eventually lose himself completely with what Lilith was doing to him, making him see, it made his blood run cold. He knew things needed to be done quickly Lilith's blood had been intoxicating Sam's blood for much too long. A whole hell of a lot longer than Dean liked.

He shook the memories off. Lilith was out there somewhere, waiting and probably watching, waiting to see Sam or even Dean show a moment of weakness. Waiting till Cas, there greatest defense, was gone. He hoped Cas would stay around, keep an eye and ear out for danger. He was only human and so was Bobby, he knew that if Lilith and her minions decided to attack they would have no chance. They all needed Cas.

Cas. He hadn't realized when he had given the angel a nickname. It just seemed to happen unexpectedly, as did a lot of things the past few months. It worried him that he was the one chosen to fight a war, a war he didn't know could be won. He didn't want any part of it, the killing and blood, he'd seen enough in his lifetime and done enough of it, that he just wanted it all to stop. Cas, though seemed to think he had the strength. The will power to do what he was assigned to do. If following some angels' orders made him lose Sam, then all the angels could start looking for someone else to finish the job.

He didn't know if anyone was looking for him, but he figured Bobby knew where he was. Bobby's place was comfortable and familiar, something they didn't have a lot of. It gave him a sense of peace and protection that ultimately gave him strength. Bobby was like a father to both Sam and himself. Always taking them in with no questions asked. Helping and aiding them in dangerous situations without a moment's hesitation even if it meant his life. So it bothered him that the man had such guilt over his death and the way Sam acted in those months.

As much as he wanted to yell and maybe punch Sam for the reckless behavior he was doing during those months he couldn't. He had not right to yell at Sam for what he did, he wasn't there. Sam had always worn his heart on his sleeve, even till this day. It made him connect easier with the victims. He wished now though that he knew what Sam was feeling, wished he had a way to make it better.

He knew after going through the entries on Sam's laptop and Bobby's own confession Sam had went through his own personal hell. He thought his time in hell was bad, it made him feel guilty for Sam having to go through his death alone.

**He wasn't alone. He had Bobby and…Ruby.**

He grit his teeth at the thought that popped into his head. Sure the kid had Bobby, but he knew Bobby could only do so much. It's not like they had true family and friends to turn to in their grief and anger. Ruby on the other hand was a whole different story. He tried to keep his anger in check, her time would come soon enough and he'd take care of her his own way.

"Dean."

He jumped, startled. Standing in front of him was Cas. He hated when the angel popped up suddenly, usually nearly giving him a heart attack.

"What Cas."

"Kailen has awoken."

He felt his heart jump. That meant they could start the detoxification process.

"Where's Bobby?"

"Reading through some of his books, I told him it was rather pointless. He didn't listen so I figure it'd be best to amuse the old man."

"Yeah well Bobby likes to cover all the facts and knowledge his brain and the books he has holds. It tends to make things easier."

"We must explain things to Kailen, make sure she still wants to help."

"What if she doesn't want to help, then what?"

"Then we find another suitable human."

"We don't have time to find someone else. That bitch's blood is killing Sam."

"I know that, but I have my own orders."

He felt anger at Cas's statement. He felt as though suddenly this was just a joke.

"Your orders? Let me tell you something. My brother and his well being are ten times more important than your orders. I suggest you follow them."

Cas was suddenly standing in front of him, his own blue eyes blazing in barely kept fury.

"You better watch who you're talking to. I won't hesitate to throw you back into the pit."

"You wouldn't because the man upstairs needs me and you wouldn't dare disobey daddy's orders, would you?"

He turned away from Cas, anger bubbling under the surface of his barely maintained control. Stress was a key factor in the situation he and Cas were currently in, but he knew there was also more to it. He had just reached Bobby's screen door, ready to enter, when the words Cas directed at him made him stop cold.

"You followed your father's orders, never once questioning them. I at least wonder and question my father. You sit on too high of a thrown Dean Winchester. My orders were to bring you out of hell because you were needed. For the time being though you aren't contributing anything, remember that. That fact right there could get you thrown back in hell."

He looked at Cas and could clearly see the fury in the angels' eyes. It confused him slightly to see such fury in someone who was supposed to be so gentle. Although the angels he was witnessed were far from gentle. It scared him to think of being put back in hell, but if they wanted to send him back he knew they could and wouldn't hesitate in doing so. Although he was in no mood to say "sorry". He needed to see Sam and talk with Bobby about anything he might of found. Although he was not one to apoligize so the only comment he could give was sarcastic and slightly true.

"Angel or not, don't talk to me until my head clears because I might just stab you in the face."

The shock that briefly crossed Cas's face gave him enough time to slip into Bobby's house. He was going to talk to Kailen.

* * *

**Author Note: So how was it? Better than Chapter 16? I really, really hope so! So yes next chapter will be with Dean talking to Kailen and some other stuff. Lol. Well all reviews are so very much appreciated!**

**~XoXo~**

**~Kaylee~**

**P.S. I know the line, "Angel or not, I will stab you in the face." What I couldn't remember was what episode it was in. I though Dean said it to Uriel...maybe I was wrong. I just couldn't help using it, it makes me giggle everytime I hear it. So yeah anyone who happens to know what episode it came from and who said it(Like I said I think it was Dean) and could tell me would be forever loved. Hehe. : )**

* * *


	19. Chapter 19

Disclaimer: I still own nothing related to Supernatural. It clearly still all belongs to Eric Kripke and company.

**Author Note: **Ijust want to make a couple of points in this thing; it's going to be slightly lengthy.

**1).** My apologies for not updating in nearly two weeks. When I say life has been hectic I really do mean so. I had to work at a fair (4 days out of the week for 12 hours a day). One day was my mom's birthday (August 4th), one day I went to see both my grandma (in a nursing home) and grandpa (haven't seen him in over a year). The one day I had to babysit, one day I went out to lunch/movie with my best friend. Ah…so life has been crazy and hectic. Plus with school starting back really soon, August 24th, I'm trying to prepare for that.

**2).** I am actually not for sure how much longer this story is going to go on. It may be another 6 chapters or another 15 chapters. It just all depends on where my muse and brain lead me. Plus a few reviews wouldn't hurt.

**3). **I have changed the summary. I have decided this has become a slight AU. Hope that doesn't throw anyone off, I am going to reassure everyone that is the SAME story.

* * *

_Chapter 18-Ending-_

_He looked at Cas and could clearly see the fury in the angels' eyes. It confused him slightly to see such fury in someone who was supposed to be so gentle. Although the angels he was witnessed were far from gentle. It scared him to think of being put back in hell, but if they wanted to send him back he knew they could and wouldn't hesitate in doing so. Although he was in no mood to say "sorry". He needed to see Sam and talk with Bobby about anything he might of found. Although he was not one to apologize so the only comment he could give was sarcastic and slightly true._

"_Angel or not, don't talk to me until my head clears because I might just stab you in the face."_

_The shock that briefly crossed Cas's face gave him enough time to slip into Bobby's house. He was going to talk to Kailen._

* * *

He entered Bobby's house, still furious. He was angry at the words Cas had spat at him. It wasn't because Cas said them, it was because he knew, deep down they were true. He never questioned his father's orders. To this day he couldn't understand why he could never tell his father "No". Maybe it was the fact that he had a seen a gentler, much more human side to his father. That was before evil had taken away everything. He shrugged, not wanting to dwell in his own self pity and thoughts. Right now, he needed to find Kailen and talk to her.

He wasn't for sure were she was at. He didn't think she'd still be in the bedroom. Bobby probably had a good idea where she was, so he'd start there. He made his way into the kitchen were Bobby sat pouring over books. The old man always said that "Books held all the answers." Bobby had been wonderful to them, both of them. He just hoped one day he would be able to return the favor. He knocked lightly on the wooden door frame, not wanting to give Bobby a heart attack.

"She's out back, by the shed."

"Thanks Bobby."

He knew Bobby would know where Kailen was at, Bobby pretty much knew everything. He quickly grabbed a beer and a bottle of water and took off outside. Sure enough after walking only a short distance he saw Kailen standing by the shed, seeming to stare off into nothing.

"I'm guessing you want to talk to me."

She looked up, eyes not questioning, but positive in what she had just asked. He nodded, handing her the bottle of water.

"What do you want to know?"

He was slightly shocked. She was the one who had once again been possessed, then knocked unconscious, then dropped off to sleep in a house she wasn't familiar with and she wanted to know what he needed? She was a very confusing girl.

"You're kidding me right?"

"No, I'm not."

"Alright let me get this straight. You want to help us, without knowing anything about us? You haven't even questioned why you're here or how you got here. That is just not normal."

She smiled, genuinely amused. The fact that Dean didn't think she knew them was actually quite funny. She knew them very well. Being possessed, not once, but twice gave her quite an insight into there lives. Although she didn't remember everything, most of the time she was possessed, there were brief moments were she felt human again and those were the moments that she really got to know the Winchesters.

"I know you don't trust me, I don't expect you too. The last year or so, I don't remember a lot of anything. It sucks and it pisses me off, but I can't change it. We can't change what we have no control over, I've come to terms with that. I've been filled in on everything, I know you probably wanted to tell me yourself, but they way I see is time is not on our side. I just want to help."

He was stunned. Out of everything he was expecting the woman in front of him to say, the honest confession she gave him was completely out of the blue. Someone had filled her in, he doubted it to be Cas and so that only left Bobby. He would have to thank him later. Everything that had happened confused him and made him want to run. The only thing that still kept his feet rooted to the ground was the fact that Sam was dying.

"So you know everything?"

"Yes."

"Even everything about the detoxification process?"

"That as well."

"So you'll help us?"

"I said I would and I mean that. Whatever you need that I can give, I will. After I help, I'll leave. I don't want to watch Sam wake up. He deserves to wake up surrounded by the people that love him and need him. Not someone who hurt him and then donated her blood to him. He doesn't need me, I don't expect him too. What he does need is you. He's always needed you and he always will. I just hope that when this all over you both can be happy."

She smiled gently at the man standing beside her, who still seemed to be in shock. The years had been rough on him. The scars both emotionally and physically were so very clear. Yet, he hid them so well. All he had left was his brother. They couldn't survive without one another, it was that simple. She wasn't helping them because she felt like she had to, she was helping them because she needed to, wanted to. Maybe if she helped them, helped save a human life, then maybe she wouldn't be damned to hell for the cruel and unjust things she had done. She was doing to this to help save what little humanity she had left and that was the honest truth.

"Thank you."

It was only two words, softly spoken and yet deep down they relaxed her. She nodded her head softly and watched as Dean walked away. Her deed was done.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

The words so honestly spoken by Kailen had shaken him to his core. They made him shiver in both awe and pity. Someone who had been plagued with evil and forced to deal with such horrible things still found peace from somewhere. He was slightly jealous because through everything he had been through he had never found peace.

He entered Bobby's house to see the table was cleared of all the books. It made him stop and wonder where the hell Bobby had gone. His thought was soon answered when the older man returned carrying a book with a worried look on his face.

"I was just getting ready to come get ya boy. You need to look at this."

He was handed a heavy book and instructed to look at the part that was circled in pencil.

_It has been said through centuries that one day a new ruler would rise. A ruler that would take over the Underworld, destroying everything and anything in his path for total domination. This ruler will be a man with special abilities. A man so powerful not even angels could destroy him. He will overpower Lucifer and take Lilith as his queen. _

_The future ruler must have the blood of his queen enter his bloodstream. This blood will automatically cleanse out any other potential threats. When the two bloods have joined a power will emerge like no human or God has every witnessed. The soul will be tainted evil, but never lost. When this soul is tainted the body will no longer respond to anyone or anything. This is said to represent the beginning of the end. _

THUD!

He had dropped the book. No, no, no, no, no, NO! The man in the book was someone different, there was no way he was his brother. It wasn't possible. It just wasn't fucking possible.

"I know, Dean, I don't know if there's anything we can do anymore."

"Don't you say that, you of all people. We're going to do this. Kailen and I, we're going to save him, we have to save him."

Bobby nodded in agreement.

"I'll go get Kailen; you just round up that angel of yours."

_Shit. _He had completely forgotten about Cas. After everything he had learned the angel was the last thing on his mind. He would help, he had to help, he was an angel after all.

"CAS, I DEMAND YOU GET YOUR TRENCH-COAT WEARING ASS IN HERE RIGHT NOW."

He was shouting, desperate for Cas to hear him. He became nervous when the angel had yet to appear.

"There's no need to shout."

He jumped when he heard the smooth and soft voice.

"Are you trying to give me a heart attack? Why can't you just knock first?"

"I figured you needed me, so I came."

"Yeah, I needed you. We have to start the detoxification process. Now. There is no time; we're going to lose him if we don't hurry."

"Why do we have to hurry?"

The question was simply stated, but the way Cas said it gave him chills. He knew that the angel knew of the prophecy, but why he kept it a secret was a question for another time.

"Like you don't know. You're honestly telling me that you've never heard of the supposed prophecy?"

The guilt shining in Cas's eyes was all the confirmation he needed. It pissed him off more than anything, but he would worry about stabbing Cas in the face later. Right now, he had more important business to worry about.

"Look, I'm still pissed at you. Right now though we need to get to Sam, start the process to save him."

Cas gave him a calculating look. Almost as if wondering if he was going to get stabbed on the way to Sam's room. He nodded his head though and breathed a sigh of relief. He heard a shuffle and knew that Kailen and Bobby were in the room. He motioned towards the stairs before taking them two at a time, hoping that what they were about to do would work.

* * *

**Author Note: Okay that is it. Did it seem too rushed? I hope not, in a way it would make since if it did seemed rush, it is now a race against time to save Sam? Will that be achieved?**

**Please, please review. They mean a lot to a writer…they're like a whole bunch of chocolate…I mean who doesn't love chocolate? **

**Love,**

**Kaylee**


	20. Chapter 20

Disclaimer: I own nothing related to Supernatural…it all belongs respectfully to Erik Kirpke and company.

Author Note: (Look below at the parenthesized numbers)

1). I want to once again offer my deepest apologies for not updating. I know it's been a while. I truly have been busy, but I hope this chapter has made up for it.

2). There will probably be some mistakes in this chapter that have to do with grammar/spelling. They are all my unintentional doing.

3) You know how you don't feel good so that makes you not want to do anything? That is another reason why I haven't updated. At first I thought I had a cold, but I doubt it's even possible to get a cold in the summer time. So I have now decided I have terrible allergies. It's every symptom possible (runny/stuffed nose, swollen/itchy eyes, sore/itchy throat, and headache.) So yes, I feel like crap…so I may not be able to review reply back for a day or so to everyone who reviews.

4) A huge THANK YOU to a wonderful friend of mine. Her name is Ritu…but on this site she goes by rit (dot) sam. She has been pushing me to update and so I have. Really the only reason this chapter is even out today is because I promised her an update…I couldn't break that promise. So thank her…although ultimate thanks would be by reviewing her stories. : D

5) Finally, just a big shout out to everyone who reviewed or has reviewed. It means so much. I really am sorry for not sending a review reply to everyone but I cleaned out my Inbox and accidentally erased everyone who had submitted a review.

**Please leave a review even if it is just one line. To know that people enjoy this story and want me to update give me encouragement to keep writing. All reviews help improve my writing some way or another. It'll only take a second to leave a line or two. **

*****~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~**

_Previously…_

_Cas gave him a calculating look. Almost as if wondering if he was going to get stabbed on the way to Sam's room. He nodded his head though and breathed a sigh of relief. He heard a shuffle and knew that Kailen and Bobby were in the room. He motioned towards the stairs before taking them two at a time, hoping that what they were about to do would work._

He was sitting by Sam's bedside. In fact he'd been sitting by Sam's bedside for the past two hours. He refused to leave. He needed to see Sam, to make sure that what they were going to do was okay. He had asked everyone to give him a few hours with Sam, even though they were running out of time. He needed to talk to him to see him before they began this terrifying process of trying to save him. Sam had no say in this, he didn't a chance to offer any other options or even if this was the way to go about it. In the end though he knew it was the only way…

He hated himself for thinking that. For thinking that if this didn't work he would lose Sam. After everything they had been through, now and over the past four years. It wasn't fair if he had to lose Sam after everything he had sacrificed. It just wasn't.

Then again what did he know about sacrificing. Some people may say that sacrificing yourself to save your brother was the ultimate sacrifice, but was it really? Sammy was **dead** because he hadn't arrived in time to save him. He hated himself for pushing Sam away that whole year after he had made the deal, but he had clung so desperately that his geeky little brother would find a way to save him that when it didn't happen….

_What's dead should stay dead_

He shuddered at the memory of uttering those words. He knew he was the world's biggest hypocrite. It didn't take a genius to figure it out. He had blamed himself for months about his dad making the deal; it nearly killed him to know that his dad had died to save him. Sold his own soul to the devil to bring him back. He could never figure out why until it was his turn to do the same thing.

He had thought a lot after he had made the deal. Was it the right thing to do? What would his dad think of him? When he walked back into the room though and saw Sam standing there, very much alive, he knew it was for the right reasons. He just never understood what it would cost him, them, until he died.

He'd like to think he was unselfish man. He saved people every single day, from any and every thing. When it came down to it though, he was the most selfish human being on the planet. If he had let Sam stay dead maybe they wouldn't be in this state, this terrible situation. In reality even if this did work he could still lose Sam, because he hadn't thought before opening his mouth.

**Why would you say those things to him?**

_Because he deserved it, he deserved everything he got._

**NO. He never deserved to feel like his own brother hated him, no one should have to feel that. **

_Then maybe he should have thought about that before he started sleeping with a demon and became some sort of human vampire. _

**He was alone, he didn't know who else to turn to or what to do.**

_Doesn't matter, you were alone when Sam died and you didn't do anything drastic._

**Yeah for a couple of hours, Sammy was alone for four months. Living with the guilt that he couldn't save me. **

_You should have listened to dad, killed the little monster when you had the chance. _

**He's my brother; I'd die before killing him. **

_Your brother? It seemed your "brother" could care less. He's been a selfish little bug ever since the day you got him back from Stanford. _

**No, he hasn't. He just lost his girlfriend the same way mom died, I wouldn't expect him to be jumping around and wanting to celebrate. I wasn't the nicest guy in the entire world either. **

_At least you never betrayed Sam. He's been lying to you all this time, been sleeping with a demon. He's a monster. All monsters deserve to be killed. _

He groaned, he couldn't take it anymore. His mind was internally battling with itself over who was right. Maybe they both were. As he sat and struggled with himself for the last how many minutes he had realized things. Maybe now wasn't the time to be realizing these important things, but at least he had realized them.

Sam was his brother, nothing could ever change that. No angel or demon, and not even an apocalyptic war. They had the same mother and father, both who had fought too damn hard to keep them safe to watch them lose the bond they had now. Sure the bond was weak, barely there, but they were both to blame for that.

He turned to his little brother, so desperate to see the hazel eyes. He needed to see Sam awake so he himself could acknowledge that his brother could hear him, see him. There was still so much time to fix things.

"Sam, I don't what to do anymore. I know I've tried this whole bleeding my heart out once to you before, but I'll do it again. You woke up last time and I know you can do it again. Look I will keep apologizing to you for the rest of my life if that is what it takes. I need you to wake up and tell me what I said is okay, even though we both know it isn't. I need you to yell at me, say you hate me just so deep down I know you still care."

He paused. He didn't know much of what he was saying, but he knew he was rambling. Right now though he didn't care.

"I've been a total dick lately, I know. I guess having you in this situation made me realize just how cruel I had been being to you. You deserve a brother who would never hurt you or disrespect you. A brother who would support you and try to understand what you're going through. I don't say the "L" word enough, especially to the people I care about. It's because I'm scared. I used to say it to mom and then she died. I never said it to dad, but I know that he knew and so then he died. The thing that bugs me is I've never actually said it to you, even when you did die two years ago. I was a coward and a weakling, I should have said it."

He grabbed Sam's hand and wrapped his own in it. Sam's hand they were massive, like over grown monkey hands. It worked for him though because as long as he had a grip on Sam, he couldn't leave him.

"Look, what I'm saying isn't making much sense, but I'm trying. None of what has happened throughout the last for months is your fault. I know that and deep down you know that, so quit punishing yourself for it. You've always come to my rescue protecting me and helping me heal. Although through the last couple of months I haven't let you. I should have, should have let you coach me through my nightmares and my anger, but I forgot how. I forgot how to let anybody that wouldn't hurt me. Maybe that's why I was angry and bitter at you. You still had the ability to trust and you allowed me in. I admire you for that, I always have and always will."

He hadn't realized it but he was shaking. He laid his head on top of the conjoined hands of both of them. He was so tired, so worn out. He didn't know where to turn or what do or say anymore. He needed Sam, needed him like oxygen to breath.

"Hey."

He thought his mind was playing tricks on him, imagining that he was hearing Sam's voice. He looked up and nearly died. Sam was awake! His hazel eyes were a little glossy but he was awake.

"Oh my god."

"It's Sam and I'm no god."

He couldn't help the watery chuckle that escaped his mouth before he pulled Sam tight against his body. He knew Sam was very weak and couldn't be handled to rough so he took extra care. He caressed Sam's hair noting just how long it had grown out. The boy would need a haircut.

"Let me get you some water."

"No, I need to talk to you."

He couldn't refuse Sam, not now when he looked so vulnerable.

"Okay."

"I don't understand what's happening and I know you'll explain it. I can only guess that you've recruited an army that includes a certain angel to take care of me. Lilith is killing me, I can feel it. I can feel my memories slipping away and it's terrifying. I don—I don't wanna lose the memories at least the good ones and I don't wanna die so I need to ask something of you, that I don't know that you give."

Sam seemed much like a child, not sure if he could ask a question for fear of the answer. He didn't blame him, hell he probably wouldn't even have the courage to talk to Sam if he was in his position. He'd give anything to Sam.

"I'll give you anything."

"I want you to save me. I know I don't deserve it after everything I've done, but I need you too save me so I can make things right. I don't want to lose you again because of the actions I took while you were gone."

He officially wanted to wring his own neck. He was pretty sure his heart had been ripped out because the anguish he felt right now was killing him. Sam should never have to ask for him to save him. No matter what happened between them, that was the past, and his top priority was saving Sam. He would make sure he died if he failed that mission.

"I'm going to save you, even if it kills me-"

"I don't des-"

"Shhh…just let me talk. I don't even know where to start. You are everything to me and you have always been everything to me. You have nothing to apologize for, nothing that you need to fix. I'm the one that needs to fix everything and there's lot that needs done. We've both said so many things, hurtful things, but we didn't mean them. We're brothers; we'd do anything for one another no matter what. If you asked me to die you for right now, I would. I would do it if that meant you'd be well again, healed. I've been the world's crappiest brother and the things I've said to you…god, mom and dad are probably so ashamed of me. When you get better, we're gonna work together to make things better."

"I'm glad you said that because I know I have something to live for. Being trapped in your own head, it sucks. It's scary because you're forced to watch everything. You don't sleep or eat; it's your own personal kind of hell. I know we're gonna be okay, we always are. It's not gonna be easy and it'll be painful but I know we can do it."

He knew he was crying, but he didn't care. He didn't care if the whole world had a free pass to see him right now, he'd gladly invite everyone to watch. He buried his head in Sam's shoulder, feeling the complete comfort and security it provided. There was so much work to do, that included the major fact of having to still save Sam but he had a renewed hope and vigor.

"Will you explain everything to me?"

"Yeah, but not yet. I need just a minute."

"Okay."

He held the back of Sam's head. The long strands of chocolate brown hair covering his hand. He never in a million years pictured him in this position. Sure, he'd cried in front of Sam, but not like this. After a few minutes he found his composure.

"What do you want brutal honesty or it sugar-coated."

"Honesty is the best policy."

"You're dying. When you were kidnapped, Lilith transferred her blood into your veins. Right now Lilith's blood is trying to wipe out Ruby's and eventually if we don't act fast it will bond will yours. If that happens you won't be Sam anymore, you'll be-"

"A monster."

It was said with such authority that he didn't dare say otherwise. There was no use in trying to tell Sam there wasn't the possibility of that happening. However, what he wouldn't tell Sam is he wouldn't allow that to happen.

"Cas is helping us, so is Bobby and Kailen. We're gonna try this detox thing, we can only hope it will work."

Surprisingly Sam seemed to be taking the news very well, almost too well.

"You okay, I mean of course your not okay, but you seem way too calm about this."

"I know I do, but knowing that you don't hate me, it makes everything okay."

He couldn't find a reply that would work in the situation, but he used his own term of endearment.

"Bitch."

"Jerk."

As he held Sam a little closer he could only pray that the next time Cas showed up and they had to begin the process that everything would some how go right. Then again they wore the name Winchester and that was an open target for something to go wrong.

* * *

**Author Note: So Sam is awake…! I hope that counts for something. I had so much fun writing this, even if it took me around 2 ½ hours. Lol. It was all for you guys. So next chapter will include the start of the detoxification process. I hope to have it up sometime over the weekend. **

****If you read this chapter, please review. Reviews are what keep an author going and encourage them. Even if it's only a few words or numerous lines, I don't care. Leaving a review is what counts****

**Lots of Love,**

**Kaylee**

**P.S. There are severe storms headed my way where I live. I HATE storms and according to the T.V. and the internet we are going to get nailed. Lots of tornado warnings and telling people to take cover. **

**Just curious how many people here dislike storms or have one headed there way? **


	21. Chapter 21

**Disclaimer: I own nothing related to Supernatural.**

**Author Note: Thank you so, so, much to everyone who reviewed. It truly means a lot. : )**

**Now I think this chapter is what a lot of people have been waiting for…so I hope it doesn't disappoint. : D**

**Please review, even if it's only one line. Reviews are so terribly needed especially when I worked extra hard on this chapter. **

* * *

_Previously…_

_He couldn't find a reply that would work in the situation, but he used his own term of endearment._

"_Bitch."_

"_Jerk."_

_As he held Sam a little closer he could only pray that the next time Cas showed up and they had to begin the process that everything would some how go right. Then again they wore the name Winchester and that was an open target for something to go wrong._

* * *

A moan escaped the sleeping body on the bed. A sheen of sweat was clearly visible on the forehead. Small tremors ran through the muscular frame. The body wound itself tighter into as small a ball as possible, willing the tendrils of fire to leave.

Dean couldn't take seeing Sam so broken, in co much pain. It was killing him because he was powerless to stop it. The one thing that could save his brother was also killing him. It terrified him, scared the shit out of him, to think of the possibility of Sam dieing. It wasn't an option, couldn't be an option.

He had disappeared from Sam's life for four months. The kid had been to hell and back, done everything he could to bring his big brother back. The guilt and heartache that was so visible on Sam's soul made Dean want to rip his own heart out. The kid tried desperately to hide his own emotions so he could take care of Dean, try to get him to open up, but it didn't work.

Now as he looked at his broken brother he wished he had opened up. Opened up to Sam that he was terrified. The nightmares never went away, they only became worse. Now instead of dreaming of his time in hell, he dreamt of Sam. He dreamt of what life would be like to go on without his oversized, puppy-dog eyed, gigantic, geek of a little brother.

He was supposed to be the strong one. Had to be ever since Sam was six months old, but sometimes things were to hard to be. He couldn't be Sam's savior know, couldn't tell Sam everything would be alright when he wasn't sure himself. He wasn't going to lie to Sam, give him false hope. He couldn't do that, not now.

"D-Dean."

He looked up and within seconds was cradling Sam. He hated the broken look in his little brother's eyes, the look of someone who had given up. It chilled him to the bone, because they both had come too far, for the journey to end like this. He wouldn't allow Sam to die in his arms, not for the second time.

"It's alright, you're okay. Nothing's gonna happen while I'm around."

How long had he been feeding that same line to the kid? He knew it had been for years and amazingly the kid still clung onto it, like a prized possession. Sam made it seem like those few words would make everything in this life better. As he looked at Sam, the broken boy in front of him, who no longer seemed like the confident, shy, young man he had once been, it made him think back to earlier that morning and just how they had gotten here.

_Flashback:_

_Sam was asleep and he didn't have anything else to do. So he soon found himself downstairs and on Bobby's porch. The old wood needed a good paint job. The original color had long ago faded and now all that was left was a pale light brown color. His fingers absently chipped at the wood, his mind occupied with other things. He hadn't even noticed when the front screen door opened until he heard it slam against the opposite door. He didn't look up, just took another sip of his beer. _

"_How ya holdin' up kid?"_

"_About as good as a person can I guess, you know under the circumstances."_

"_How's Sam doing?"_

"_Truthfully, okay I guess. He has always been the caring and sharing type and this whole situation hasn't changed that, I guess it's just a little surprising, how forgiving the kid still is, after everything that's happened."_

"_Sam is Sam, you should know the boy would forgive ya, he idles you. Always has, and a situation like this, the blame can't be pointed at either one of ya, it can only be blamed at the ones who did this to the both of ya"_

"_Why is he so forgiving? After losing everyone, I'd be angry man, bitter forever at the world."_

"_Dean ya know Sam better than anyone and vice-versa. Dean, that boy ain't got nothing in his bones but love for you, for his family. No matter what ya said to him, that boy needs ya and you need him. So no matter what happens, what you do to him and say to him, he's gonna forgive ya. Just believe that, everyone else does."_

_The answer was solid, no ifs ands or butts about it. He knew Bobby was right because he felt the exact same way. Even though Sam had screwed up, gone behind his back and straight out lied to him, Sam was his brother, the only family he had left. And no matter what he wasn't just going to shove Sam aside when Sam needed him. Although if he thought about he had shoved Sam aside, pushed him more into Ruby's arms than anything. That was his fault and he knew that, so that was why he needed Sam to keep fighting because there was still a long way to go, a lot of things he still had to fix. _

"_Bobby do you—do you honestly think we can save Sam?"_

_There was a moment of hesitation before Bobby answered, almost as if he was being careful the way he said his next words. _

"_I do. Sam has always been a fighter. He's survived more things than a person should have too in there lifetime, both of ya boys have. Sam fights for what he wants, always has and if he wants to live then he's gonna live."_

_He didn't say anything because he wasn't sure how to comment that. He had never really believed in angels, but now that one was helping them it put things in perspective. It made him realize that through all the evil and pain, heartbreak they had witnessed, just maybe there was some good left in the world. Hopefully the true form of goodness would come from Cas, because they needed a miracle. _

"_What if this detox thing doesn't work? I can't lose him Bobby, not again."_

"_It's gonna work, it has too. Sam is as strong as they come, hell he's a Winchester, he'll make it."_

"_Bobby…it scares the hell out of me to think about what the future holds, after this all ends what we'll be left with."_

"_It's simple then, don't think about the future. None of us have any idea what will happen tomorrow, so why worry?"_

_There was a pause. He being somewhat of a snark couldn't help but take a small stab at Bobby, if only for a moment of comedic relief. _

"_Wow, I had no idea you were so wise. Old age has done a lot for you."_

"_Oh shut up ya idgit."_

_A comfortable silence fell over the two men. He knew things were going to get rough; it wasn't like anything in their lives was at all easy. But he knew they had each other and for now that was enough. _

"_Bobby, thank you for everything you've done. I-we don't what we would do without you."_

"_Don't mention it."_

_As he took another sip of his beer he suddenly felt relaxed. It was though talking with Bobby was like talking with his dad. Hell, Bobby was practically like a second father to them. Bobby had offered a type of stable reassurance that only a "father" could. He knew that Bobby was behind them 100% whether he agreed or disagreed with whatever decisions they made. It gave him comfort to know he would always have Bobby to talk to, lean on for a little extra support. _

"_I hate to interrupt, but Castiel is here."_

_He swallowed thickly as he heard Kailen speak gently because, he knew today was the day the process would begin. As he swallowed the last of his beer and followed Bobby into the house he realized he was shaking. Truth be told he was terrified of what Cas was going to tell them; he really couldn't take any more surprises. _

_As he followed Bobby into the living room, he sighed. Cas stood in all his glory, like he did this everyday. His face was blank but his eyes revealed things that he was trying to hide. His eyes showed sorrow and regret, and this worried Dean. _

"_Cas what's going on?"_

"_The elders they are not at all happy at the events that have recently occurred. They feel as though Sam is too big of a threat and should be destroyed."_

"_Destroyed? Please tell me this is some kind of sick joke, I mean I don't know if angels can play jokes, but you won't let that happen, right?"_

"_Dean, I have my own orders to follow."_

"_You and your orders…god damn it Cas, this is my brother we're talking about. Do you understand what happens if he…if I don't save him?"_

"_The world ends, you've told me that already."_

"_What and the world suddenly ending doesn't matter to you or the great, big man up stairs?"_

"_You were brought back to save the world and sacrifices must be made."_

"_I know sacrifices have to be made, but not my brother. He isn't evil and he's not a monster, he never has been. Please Cas…just help me, help us."_

_The conversation that had been going on solely between Cas and Dean and was being watched very carefully by both Kailen and Bobby who were not about to interrupt. They weren't going to risk the chance at Dean changing Cas's mind, not with Sam's life on the line. _

"_Okay I'll help you, under one condition."_

"_You stay with us and help as save the rest of humanity no matter what happens to your brother."_

_He didn't know what to say. It was a lose-lose situation. If Sam made it, then great, but that didn't mean pissed off angels wouldn't be on their ass. If he didn't make it, he had to live with that fact and still help save humanity. It was a huge load to have on his shoulders but if it got Cas back on their side…_

"_Fine, but what exactly needs to be done to save him."_

"_Both the blood of you and Kailen needs to be put directly into Sam's bloodstream. The blood is gonna have to go in separately from each of you and then a mixed combination. Kailen's blood needs to be taken first, then yours. That's the order the blood will be put into Sam. Then we mix your blood together."_

_It sounded so weird, the way Cas said it. But he'd do whatever he had to and thankfully he knew Kailen would to. He just didn't know how they were supposed to get the blood from their bodies into Sam. Before he could say anything Bobby spoke up. _

"_I get the whole blood thing, but how's it supposed to be put into Sam's blood stream?"_

"_He'll need to have Kailen and Dean's blood put into a vein so it starts immediately washing out Lilith's blood. However the mixed blood will need to be ingested."_

_He felt sick at the thought of having to see Sam drink blood. It was disgusting and so…inhuman like. It didn't sit well with him. Then again, Sam had been drinking Ruby's blood, but this situation was nothing like that with Ruby. _

"_Drink it you mean?"_

"_Yes, but from what I know Sam seems to have that down pat."_

_The stab at Sam didn't sit well with him. What Sam had done while he was in hell should still not be being brought up. It was over and done with and he refused to let the things that he had no control over damage his relationship with Sam anymore than it already had. So instead he let the statement roll off his back. _

"_Will he be in pain?"_

_That was his main concern, what type of pain would Sam be in? He didn't want Sam going through all this, suffering. _

"_The pain will be brutal. The blood is going to cause adrenaline to pump through is veins at an alarming rate; he's going to hallucinate, say things that he doesn't realize he's saying. It's going to feel like his organs are being ripped out one by one. It will be his own personal hell."_

_Everyone in the room stared in shock. The idea of anyone having to go through that was unimaginable. But the thought of someone like Sam, who had been nothing but a victim didn't deserve that kind of brutality against them, no matter if it was saving his life or not. _

"_Ya can't give the poor boy anything?"_

_Good ol' Bobby always trying to find a way to protect them; help them through this current situation. _

"_No, if he survives this, it'll be the start to his recovery."_

"_Damn."_

_Yeah he had to agree with Bobby hull heartedly on this one. He knew though, beyond a doubt that if Sam had something worth fighting for, he was going to survive. Sam now knew that he had people that loved him, especially his older brother. He just hoped that would be enough. _

_He watched as Cas seemed to deem the conversation closed and then began heading upstairs, towards Sam's room. He knew it was time to begin. It scared the shit out of him, not knowing what the next couple of days would hold. So as he watched Bobby and Kailen follow Cas, he did something he hadn't done in a long, long time. He prayed. He prayed for Sam and himself, hoping someone was listening. _

"Shhh…its okay Sammy. I gotcha ya."

He tried desperately to quite the sobs that had escaped his younger brother, while he was reveling in that morning's events and the events that followed. Sam was currently curled into the fetal position, rocking gently back and forth. Sweat poured off his forehead more so than it had been earlier, causing his hair to dampen and stick up in different directions. Sam was shaking as if he had a fever, but he knew it was from the pain.

"I-it-it feels like my-inte-intestin-intestines are being ripped out."

He choked back his own sob. His brother's pain was almost unbearable to witness. Sam had refused to let anyone get close to him, but Dean. The comfort that Dean tried to provide didn't seem to be working and it was making him worry.

Taking the blood from both Kailen and Dean had been the easy part. It had simply been like getting your blood drawn. Two vials had been taken from the both of them. One vial from each was to be put separately into Sam's blood stream. The other leftover vials were what Sam had to ingest. For now though, he was just too weak to do anything.

What was happening now was the hard part. Watching someone you love writher in pain is heartbreaking and there was no relief that could be found. So all Dean could do was wrap his arms a little tighter around Sam and whisper little nothings in his ear. The shaking had yet to stop, but it seemed to have receded some. He hated seeing Sam in this kind of pain. It was like watching the person you loved the most in the world die slowly…without any visual proof that were indeed slowly slipping away.

"Ma-make it stop, I can't take it anymore."

"Yeah you can little brother, don't let this beat you. You're so much stronger than you realize and you're gonna make it, because I say so."

"Big bro-brother knows b-be-best huh?"

"Damn straight."

A small sigh escaped his brother's lips and Sam seemed to burrow himself farther into Dean's arms. Dean couldn't help but wonder, if Sam was in this much pain now, what would happen when he had to drink the blood that was mixed? It made him wonder as he once again began whispering little nothings into Sam's ear just how much one person, one human, could take?

* * *

**Author Note: I finished this chapter. This was my longest chapter to date at nearly 8 pages. : )**

**A Note To Everyone:**

**~Please drop a review, I hope I get more than 6 or 7 reviews. I know some people don't like to review WIP, but if you could, just this once it would make my day, so much better. I write for you guys and to not know what your thoughts are…kind of stings. So again, just one line would be fantastic.~**

**I hope to have another chapter out sometime this weekend, but school started for me today, and I make no promises on that. : D**

**Oh and if ya'll get the time please check out my poll. ^_^**

**Lots of Love,**

**Kaylee**


	22. Author Note

**Hello,**

**I have not died nor have I forgotten this story, or any of my stories for that matter. I have been so incredibly busy these past few months it's crazy. **

**Through the past two months I've had all of the following:**

**-A Huge Family Blowout**

**-Was Sick For a Week**

**-Homecoming**

**-At least 2 tests a week, sometimes 3 or 4 tests depending on the class.**

**-A event or something to do every single weekend. **

**-Numerous guy problems.**

**-A Huge Blowout With A "Friend"**

**-A Buttload of Homework, usually every night.**

**-Work. **

**-Working on some other peices or writing...**

**So with all that stuff going on where ever has there been time to update? **

**I deeply apologize for not updating in so, so long. I do truly feel terrible. I hope I still have everyone's support. I do want to update my stories, please believe that. The only problem is finding time. **

**Again...I HAVE NOT FORGOTTEN ABOUT THIS STORY. **

**I will do what I can to update in the next couple of days...I have no school on Monday due to the holiday. So I'll see what I can do...**

**If you'd like to leave a reiview, I'd love to read them. **

**Much Love,**

**Kaylee**


	23. Chapter 23

Hello everyone,

I promise you all I have not forgotten about this story or any of my other stories. I have been completely swamped with school. I've had three 100 point English assignments due all in the past couple weeks. Plus upon not feeling very good and then the holidays, updating has been nearly impossible. So I wanted to let everyone know that I **will update**, I promise. I can only update when I have a few moments to breathe. I have a Thanksgiving Dinner with my dad's side of the family today, in St. Louis, Missouri, and my dad is yelling at me to get my butt moving. *grins*…

I hope I continue to have everyone's support and understanding.

Feel free to leave me feedback!

Much Love and Happy [be-lated] Thanksgiving,

Kaylee.


End file.
